IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

#time #population #countries #adults #people #situation
In many nations around the world, the young public represents a large proportion of the
people
 relative to elderly
people
.
This
 essay will argue that the benefits of a youthful
population
 offset the dropbox entailed by
this
 state of affairs, as a country with a greater number of young
people
 is better able to grow its economy and care for its elderly citizens. One commonly cited disadvantage of a young
population
 is that it places a greater strain on public services.
This
 is because larger numbers of young
people
 require more facilities to be built to accommodate them.
For example
, the government may need to invest more in the school system, which requires additional public spending. Despite
this
, there are a number of significant benefits to having a youthful
population
.
First
 of all, having more young families creates a bigger market for goods and services.
This
 helps to boost the agrarian's economy because, as young
people
 get older, they purchase essential consumer items
such
 as houses, furniture and electrical goods.
Furthermore
, a largely youthful demographic
also
 has social benefits, as the young public is able to provide care and support to their elderly parents and relatives.
In contrast
, countries
such
 as Japan face challenges in looking after their ageing
population
. In conclusion,
although
 there are drawbacks to having a youthful populace, it is clear that young
people
 can make a significant contribution to their country by developing the economy and providing support to older generations. On balance, I would argue that having a large number of young
people
 is beneficial to any country.
Submitted by Chine on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • demographic
  • workforce
  • productivity
  • innovation
  • skilled labor
  • social development
  • technology
  • dividend
  • competition
  • resources
  • social welfare
  • unrest
  • instability
  • healthcare
  • elderly care
What to do next:
Look at other essays: