IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Governments should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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There are some
people
Use synonyms
 who opine that money should be invested in railways rather than
roads
Use synonyms
. From my point of view, I agree with
this
Linking Words
 opinion because I believe that the former can bring us more advantages than the latter.
First
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 of all, it goes without saying that
roads
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 so far have played a vital role in our daily lives since many years ago. Thanks to the emergence of the road network,
people
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 can easily travel from
one
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 point to another
one
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 by using both private and public transportations
such
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 as bicycles, cars, buses and so on. It
also
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 brings a great deal of convenience to dwellers as going on
roads
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 may enable them to go to every niche and stop whenever they want.
However
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, we can not deny the truth that the excessive number of vehicles on
roads
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 has triggered air pollution problems due to the emission of exhaust fumes to the environment day by day.
On the other hand
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, the development of the railway system has
also
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 improved the overall quality of
one
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 country and its resident remarkably in different aspects.
One
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 of the biggest benefits of rails is that they provide
people
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 with safety rather than driving on
roads
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. Since the rail network is constructed and operated separately from
roads
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, it can help to decrease bottlenecks and traffic accidents caused by other means of transportation, especially in peak hours.
For example
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, the unconscious of road users
such
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 as running red lights or drinking has caused serious injuries to individuals and the community.
Besides
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, the increasing number of
people
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 using trains and rails in daily commute will significantly reduce the number of fumes released by private vehicles that positively influence our health. As mentioned reasons above, allocating financial resources to rails
instead
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 of
roads
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 is a policy that the governments should apply since railways are more beneficial to our life. If the rail network is upgraded and extended, it will encourage
people
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 to use
this
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 mode of public transportation and reduce using their own vehicles which to some extent damage the environment and
people
Use synonyms
’s health.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Carbon emissions
  • Mass transportation
  • Traffic congestion
  • Economic growth
  • Regional development
  • Initial investment
  • Feasibility
  • Flexibility
  • Rural areas
  • Integration
  • Sustainable
  • Efficiency
  • Infrastructure
  • Commuters
  • Public expenditure
  • Autonomous vehicles
  • Long-term investment
  • Accessibility
  • Connectivity
  • Modal shift
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