IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people believe that smartphones are destroying social interaction today. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #smartphones #interaction
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It is very much true that smartphones are ruling the world. The current social
media
 activities are completely operating by these phones only.
Therefore
 a fair amount of
people
 believes that the present social
media
 is dominating and destroying be the smart devices and I totally agree with
this
 statement and would like to express my viewpoints on the same. To embark on, The mobile can do anything and everything in the present advanced society.
Firstly
, most
people
 are holding smart devices and operating their social
media
 posts in just a fraction of time.
Secondly
, no matter what kind of post they are posting or watching and it is just a message on their social account. When they have a smart device and
then
 the user will look for a new message or try to post something which is not relevant,
such
 kind of post may lead to creating some conflicts or issues between two places or groups.
On the other hand
, some fack account holders are operating their social
media
 platforms by using
this
 mobile to gain some money and innocent
people
.
For instance
, recent blackmail to all Twitter account holders demanding funds to transfer to unknown accounts. As per recent Google survey findings, 90% of social
media
 platforms are operating through smartphones only.
However
, undoubtedly, there must be some regulations and policies that are very much required between social
media
 and smartphones. The social
media
 company has to update their terms and conditions and need to bring up more awareness activities in the public so that
people
 can use these services in the right way without any issue to anyone. And
last
 but not least, local government bodies
also
 need to set up some watchdogs to eliminate unwanted stuff on the websites. To sum up, One must know what one is doing on social
media
 platforms and no matter what kind of device one is operating through it. The smartphone must be used for good purposes and
finally
 everything in our hands.
Submitted by tejakondapalli88 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • limit
  • face-to-face communication
  • social media
  • loss of real connections
  • distract
  • engaging
  • empathy
  • personal connection
  • addictive
  • isolation
  • enhance
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