Physical appearance may play an important role in many spheres of life: in the person’s success in school, in relationships with people, in the choice of a career path. Say whether you agree or disagree with it, and if you see it as a positive or negative factor.

#appearance #role #spheres #life #person’s #success #school #relationships #people #choice #career #path #factor

Some said

appearance

plays a significant role in many aspects of life, for

instead

, social, mental or even academic sides, to name just a few. I accord with

this

statement as people tend to judge a book by its cover and whether it is a positive factor or not, depends on how beautiful you are. Apparently, people with good-looking have more opportunities in the workplace. Imagining you are the human resources manager in a company and considering two candidates with similar backgrounds in terms of work experiences and qualifications. Whom would you pick for the opening position?

Definitely

Add a comma

,Definitely

show examples

the one has better advantage on his/her look as

this

helps to boost the company's image, especially when the position is consumer-oriented.

Moreover

, visual matters to human beings. We tend to treat people who look pretty nicer, and

this

explains why beautiful girls are more popular at school.

Nonetheless

, physical

appearance

can't entirely be a positive factor in the sense that we have different definitions of beauty. If you are viewed as beautiful by someone else, you certainly have advantages over that. Yet, our views differ when it comes to beauty. One may reckon a girl looks gorgeous while others are not, even worse, others may think she looks ugly. In

this

case, physical

appearance

may contribute adverse impacts to the girl and

hence

not a positive factor. In conclusion,

appearance

matters and it affects many perspectives of our lives and it can be regarded as an advantage only if you are beautiful enough. If not, it may work the other way around. Given the importance it has, we should try our best to look decent at all times.

Submitted by s1113338 on Wed Jul 21 2021

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

277 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Physical appearance may play an important role in many spheres of life: in the person’s success in school, in relationships with people, in the choice of a career path. Say whether you agree or disagree with it, and if you see it as a positive or negative factor.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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People are responsible for their happiness. Others feel happiness depends on other factors in their life. Discuss both views and give your opinion ?