IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Weather countries should accept more refugees and provide them with basic assistance, such as food and housing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#weather #countries #refugees #assistance #food
Generally, some
countries
 are falling down every year
with
Change preposition
for
show examples
 any reason that they can not be able to help
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
 citizens to grow. Strong
countries
 must help those needy
people
 with the basic things to live. I am going to discuss some noted points to
this
 statement. Developed
countries
 should help other
countries
 in every possible way
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
which they need. They should call the refugees to live with them in a normal way as they were living previously. As they can easily get food to live and house to stay in another country.
For example
, as per the recent case of Afghanistan country, the USA and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Canada are calling to the
people
 with free cost to their country and continue their
life
instead
 of suffering in
critical
Add an article
a critical
show examples
situation
Fix the agreement mistake
situations
show examples
. They are taking almost 20% to 50%
Change preposition
of resident
show examples
resident
Fix the agreement mistake
residents
show examples
 to get
better
Add an article
a better
show examples
life
. On the other side, developed
countries
 have
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
 residents, who are living with full rights and security
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. If they invited refugees and provided what they require
then
 they must sacrifice
life
 and
their
Replace the word
they're
they are
show examples
related
Replace the word
relation
show examples
 to happiness and many more things.
This
 would not be
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 right way to get
life
 to others.
For instance
, the residence
people
 feel some helplessness after entering new persons in town
likewise
 in the opportunity term because they will
also
 do jobs and do everything as others. In conclusion, strong
countries
 can call refugees but after making some new rules, policies and trust in
people
 who are living so they will always feel their privacy, own rules, and
life
 as well. Because of
that
Add a comma
,that
show examples
 the peace will maintain with satisfaction among each other.
Submitted by vishakhashah2393 on

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