Some people think that money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without money? What other factors contribute towards happiness?

#people #money #factors #happiness

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It is believed by some

people

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that wealth is the most prominent factor which makes

people

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happy. As much

money

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they have, they will be happier. In my opinion,

money

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is an important factor in

people

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's lives,

however

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, is not the only one that promotes

happiness

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. Other

things

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are

also

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needed to make you happy.

People

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required

money

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to maintain a good lifestyle and to

fulfill

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fulfil

show examples

their daily needs. If they are earning enough, they can easily buy the

things

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they want. When the person has the

things

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they wanted, they feel relaxed.

In contrast

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this

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this

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people

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behavior

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behaviour

show examples

that they want more and more,

for instance

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, if the person has the car

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he wants his own house

then

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he dreams about having all luxurious

things

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and

this

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list go on continue and for that he focus onto earning more and more and

this

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makes his life more stressful. He will be having no

time

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for his family, friends, and the most important himself. I believed that for

happiness

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money

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is not the only factor, other

things

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such

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as having family, friends, and

time

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for yourself are

also

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important. Spending

time

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with your loved ones makes you happier.

Similarly

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, you must have

time

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for your interests, when you do that you will feel more energetic and lively. In conclusion,

happiness

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can not buy through

money

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. Earn enough so that you can maintain a good lifestyle, but for

happiness

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, you need

people

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around you with whom you can spend your

time

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. There is one saying "Health is Wealth", so maintain a healthy body and live a happy life.

Submitted by liuhuixia0816 on Thu Sep 16 2021

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

270 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Promoting happiness
Essential factors
Financial stability
Material wealth
Personal fulfillment
Contentment
Basic needs
Maslow's hierarchy of needs
Social connections
Pursuing passions
Well-being
Mental health
Spiritual practices
Personal growth
Community service
Societal contribution
Philanthropy
Joy
Satisfaction
Prosperity

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Some people think that money is one of the most essential factors in promoting happiness. Do you think people can be happy without money? What other factors contribute towards happiness?

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In some countries, companies allow people to work from home. In others, people are still expected to work in an office. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people claim that it is acceptable to use animals in medical research for the benefit of human beings, while others argue that it is wrong. Discuss both views and give your opinion.