Nowadays, many animal species are becoming extinct. Some people believe that countries and individuals must solve this problem, others believe that human beings are more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In the era of industrialization, various animal
species
are currently on the edge of extinction. I agree that the governments make efforts to address problems of not only human society but
also
of endangered animals.
Firstly
, there is no doubt that human beings are considered the most important
species
living on the earth. Being a unique
species
with emotions, intelligence and dramatic evolution, humans have been playing
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
decisive role in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
civilization, making the world socio-economy more and more developed over centuries. What people do,
thus
, has
strong
Correct article usage
a strong
show examples
influence
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
other
species
.
For instance
, the habit of reducing daily waste can greatly contribute to the green environment, or the way employing the endangered animals could decide its extinction. That’s why human lives deserve a priority over other creatures. Regardless
the
Change preposition
of the
show examples
undeniable importance of human
being
Fix the agreement mistake
beings
show examples
, taking action for the conservation of
animal
Fix the agreement mistake
animals
show examples
cannot be ignored.
Extinction
Correct article usage
The extinction
show examples
of various
species
obviously leads to
unbalance
Change the form of the verb
unbalanced
show examples
ecosystem. Specifically, it can cause a loss of the food chain, water to other creatures, including humans. It is clearly seen that animal has been
such
a pivotal factor existing side by side with human daily lives.
For example
, even tiny bacteria can help us clean the environment. Sea lions help researchers monitor conditions under the sea where few people are able to go so that useful
study
Fix the agreement mistake
studies
show examples
and
invention
Fix the agreement mistake
inventions
show examples
will be made. In conclusion, the protection of endangered
species
of animals and the protection of the human
species
should go hand-in-hand. The governments should invest more funds and resources in the preservation of all
creature
Fix the agreement mistake
creatures
show examples
lives for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
global sustainable development.
Submitted by khuongquynhnga1997 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Read more in the eBook

The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »

* free ebook for Premium users

What to do next:
Look at other essays: