In most countries, fast food is becoming cheaper and more available. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

In today’s context,

junk

food

is more approachable and little by little, it plays an essential role on a daily basis. From my perspective, I regard the drawbacks of

this

development outweigh the benefits. Unarguably, fast

food

is quite important and it brings certain advantages for

people

. A compelling one is that

junk

food

including hamburgers, pizzas, taco,etc can boost one’s mental health. To justify

this

, fast

food

contains a high sugar and salt content,

thus

it is a delectable and highly addictive cuisine. Another merit is that fast

food

also

suitable for the fast-paced and modern society. To illustrate,

junk

food

is served rapidly and always instantly available for working

people

on the go. Plus, it can free parents from the burden of meal prepping for children. Notwithstanding, some

people

regard the disadvantages of

junk

food

outweigh

Change preposition

as outweigh

show examples

the benefits.

Firstly

, consuming manifold

junk

food

takes tolls on

people

's health. To justify

this

that

Correct determiner usage

show examples

diet can easily cause various problems

such

as obesity, diabetes, high blood pressure, and cardiovascular diseases. Nick Avocado - a

food

vlogger is a prime example who has been consuming a ton of fast

food

for 6 years and his legs now are disabled.

Furthermore

, the climate is threatened by waste from all over the world. Each year,

people

release 1.3 billion tons of waste and most of them come from

food

, especially fast

food

. In conclusion,

junk

food

can provide both benefits and drawbacks for

people

. Personally, I believe fast

food

development still brings more disadvantages for society.

Submitted by phamthaovan20 on Sat Oct 16 2021

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

254 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Convenience
Nutritional value
Obesity epidemic
Job creation
Disposable income
Culinary diversity
Processed foods
Economic stimulus
Cultural homogenization
Sustainable practices
Public health
Consumerism

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In most countries, fast food is becoming cheaper and more available. Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some people belive that too many resources and attention are devoted to the protection of wild animals and birds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. what are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

Technology is being used more and more in education. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages.

Films and computer games which contain violence are very popular. Some people believe they have a negative effect on society and so should be banned. Other people, however, say they are just harmless and help people to relax. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.