IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people say that the main environment on problem for our time is to loss of particulare species of plans an animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both of these views and give your own opinion.

#people #environment #time #loss #particulare #species #plans #animals
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A group of people maintain that
lossing
Correct your spelling
losing
 a different sort of
animals
Use synonyms
 or plants is the main
issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue
show examples
 in the environment that we are living in. While, some other of them believe that
another
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 issues,
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 air pollution are more important than
lossing
Correct your spelling
losing
animals
Use synonyms
. From my point of view,
although
Linking Words
 there are too many important environmental problems, extinction of
animals
Use synonyms
 or some special types of plants is the main one.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, animal and plant's
generation
Fix the agreement mistake
generations
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 will be disappeared in the soon future.Whenever and wherever a type of animal disappears because of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
illness or hunting, it's the beginning of losing another sort of them.
This
Linking Words
 circle will go on because they lose their food source and after a long time, when all of the
animals
Use synonyms
died
Wrong verb form
die
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 out, human's food will decrease until we have Nothing to eat and survive. So we might start hunting others
to
Correct your spelling
so
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 we could just stay alive.
As a result
Linking Words
,
earth
Add an article
the earth
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 would be disappeared.
For example
Linking Words
, in
Iran
Add a comma
,Iran
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 after the
last
Linking Words
 Iranian cheetah had died out, the number of snakes
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 feed and
then
Linking Words
 decrease and it might fall either. Air pollution is
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
another type of natural
issues
Fix the agreement mistake
issue
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. It has too many harmful effects not only on
humans
Replace the word
human
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 life
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 but
also
Linking Words
 on the Ozon layer which is going to produce some other
difficalties
Correct your spelling
difficulties
 on global warming.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it injures
human
Correct article usage
the human
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 body and health. it's the main reason
of
Change preposition
for
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 skin cancer which might be really common and hurts too many people. Another reason is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 it would
harms
Change the verb form
harm
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 the health of
heart
Correct article usage
the heart
show examples
,
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 springing heart attack.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
its
Replace the word
it's
it is
show examples
torn
Wrong verb form
tore
show examples
 the Ozon layer which is protecting us from the dangerous ray of the sun. So, if it completely breaks, our life would be as difficult as possible. In conclusion, most of the other problems would be solved by
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 or even people but there would be no way for keeping all sorts of
animals
Use synonyms
 or plants alive.
Submitted by roshaniomolbanin on

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