The growing number of overweight people is putting a strain on the health care system in an effort to deal with the health issues involved. Some people think that the best way to deal with this problem is to introduce more physical education lessons in the school curriculum. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #strain #health #care #system #effort #education #lessons #school #curriculum

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Medical issues associated with heavily weighted populations are straining medical delivery worldwide. Several individuals imagine that revising educational content to include more exercise and sports-related activities would be ideal to resolve

this

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problem. I totally agree with

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statement.

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position will be discussed in the essay below.

First

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and foremost, more workout-related lessons can help to motivate as well as force fat individuals to lose some kilograms during their training.

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would assist in reducing the number of people that go to hospitals for ailments

such

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as raised blood pressure and different types of cancers.

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, one doctor appeared on a USA television station

last

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year saying that people must use Covid-19 lockdowns to their advantage and do indoor workouts in order to limit their chances of being hospitalised, let alone having severe illnesses and at worst death from the virus.

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, according to the doctor, would

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save the government a lot of money and hospital beds.

Secondly

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, when people learn about physical education in the curriculum, they become more informed about the importance of staying active,

that is

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the advantages and disadvantages of doing so, which can help them to prevent unnecessary ailments.

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, they can share

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info with their circles so that an entire culture of health is cultivated which is beneficial to the overall medical condition of a nation.

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, as the old adage says that prevention is better than cure, many universities in Australia are now emphasising the teaching of specific general courses on bodybuilding and exercise hoping that

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can encourage their students to reduce fat content in their bodies. In conclusion,

therefore

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, I completely agree with the view that introducing more physical education in schools will reduce the strain on health care systems resulting from illnesses related to obesity.

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position has been clearly justified in the two paragraphs above. Being informed on obesity and its ills and being motivated or even forced to exercise are some of the benefits discussed.

Mon Nov 22 2021

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meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
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meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
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Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

332 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

obesity rates
health care system
physical education
instill
long term
raise awareness
healthier lifestyle choices
nutritional education
active transport
quality of instruction
facilities and equipment
diet control initiatives
community sports programs

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