IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

It is a natural process for animal species to become extinct (e.g. dinosaur, dodo…) There is no reason why people should try to prevent this from happening. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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It is widely acknowledged that
animals
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 are naturally pushed closer to the brink of
extinction
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 and there is no point in curbing
this
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 for humans. I personally disagree with
this
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 conviction and will support my argument in the essay below.
Although
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 some
species
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, namely dinosaurs, disappeared by the virtue of natural factors
such
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 as disasters or climate change, it is undeniable that the main underlying roots for the progressive extinctions nowadays are human impacts. There is an eclectic mix of human activities that wreak havoc on not only the population but
also
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 the shelter of wild
animals
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 involved in various aspects in light of their ceaseless pursuit of urban sprawl.
For instance
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, the increasingly dire illegal rhino horn trade in Vietnam for the belief of its promising medical value eventually resulted in the
extinction
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 of
this
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species
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 in
this
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 country in 2010. What’s more, the pressing global warming caused by ever-growing industrial detrimental impacts is posing a threat to the natural habitat for wild
animals
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 living in cold deserted areas
such
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 as penguins and bears in the North pole.
Hence
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, it is unwise to claim that humans take no responsibility for the demise of thousands of
species
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.
As a result
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, humans ought to
endeavor
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endeavour
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 to combat the
extinction
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 of some
animals
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, or else the serious consequences will bloom, which jeopardizes humankind itself. There would be disruptions in the food chain triggered as a single wild
species
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 is missing in the
ecosystem
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eco-system
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 leading to others being pushed to the verge of
extinction
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. Pollinating insects like bumblebees can be cited as a notable example since they play an integral role in the growth of crops.
Thus
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, the decline of
this
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 has understandably provoked a widespread concern regarding agriculture productivity. All in all, unless some measures are taken, the inseparable relationship between the human race and wildlife will arise and fatally harm the ecosystem. The disappearance of many animal
species
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 does not always occur as a natural process but as a consequence of our doings. It is our obligation to help preserve wild
animals
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 because their
extinction
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 will have a severe influence on many important aspects of our lives.

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • extinction
  • evolution
  • biodiversity
  • ecosystem
  • habitat destruction
  • climate change
  • conservation
  • irreversible
  • ecological balance
  • species preservation
  • environmental ethics
  • sustainability
  • endangered species
  • natural selection
  • ecosystem services
  • wildlife protection
  • moral obligation
  • human intervention
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