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Band 7

One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

#consequences #care #people #life #expectancy #outweigh
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Medical
care
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 is one of the biggest problems which affects the health and ages of
people
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.
Thus
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, some
people
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 claim that
people
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 are living longer and longevity is growing due to the development of medical
care
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. While there are admittedly positive influences of doing
this
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, I believe that draw-backs are more significant. There are dozens of reasons why I think negative effects are more clear. One of the biggest problems is an increasing number of older
people
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 who are pressured to welfare. The government should allocate more budget to support older
people
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, and reduce the money diverted to build facilities to develop economics and reduce pay attention of foreign investment.
Moreover
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, the number of
people
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 in the age of workers reduces so the government tends to import workers from other countries which affects social security and more residents live in insecurities because it is difficult for the government to control import workers. Naysayers may argue that older
people
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 live longer
such
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 as: their parents, they can take
care
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 of them and feel happy when they have parents usually beside. Older
people
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 tend to be more sick so their sons spend more hours and money to take
care
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 of their parents. Younger
people
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 work more hours to have money to support them which affects their health and they do not have time to spend on their son
such
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 as: take
care
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, share life experience with their children so it can be affected to the development of society in the future. In conclusion, I would like to reiterate that
people
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 are living longer which is good for their son’s spirit but puts great pressure on society.
Submitted by jakedth162 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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