IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

The gap between the rich and the poor is becoming wider; the rich are becoming richer, and the poor are getting even poorer. What problems can the situation cause? What can be done to reduce this gap?

#gap #situation
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The divide between rich and poor
nations
Use synonyms
 is an issue that does not seem to be going away and
this
Linking Words
 gap is getting more and more expansive.
This
Linking Words
 is a problem that we must overcome in order to create a better future.
First
Linking Words
 and foremost, the lack of
education
Use synonyms
 is a prominent reason. Poor families cannot afford for their children to go to school as they have to pay for tuition fees, learning tools and many other fees. Without any
education
Use synonyms
, these children would not find a better job and they would keep being poor.
Besides
Linking Words
, overpopulation is
also
Linking Words
 one of the reasons for inequality between rich and poor
nations
Use synonyms
. Natural sources are declining because of overpopulation.
For instance
Linking Words
, in the
last
Linking Words
 two ,decades the population in India has just doubled and due to
this
Linking Words
, the government is unable to fulfil the fundamental needs of people and resulting in poverty. The
last
Linking Words
 cause is the development of technology. In a world where technology has become a crucial factor of economic growth, technological advances have had a significant impact on society. It is very difficult to lower the gap between wealthy and unwealthy
countries
Use synonyms
, but it is not impossible.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it is important for authorities to pay attention to personal development,
such
Linking Words
 as
education
Use synonyms
 and technology, which are the keys to boosting them in the future.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the government can even provide
education
Use synonyms
 for free for the ones who cannot afford it.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, developed
nations
Use synonyms
 should come forward together to provide essential aids to poor
nations
Use synonyms
 by helping them financially and developing
countries
Use synonyms
 should give the necessary information about population control. Because of that, the difference between rich and poor
countries
Use synonyms
 will end. In conclusion, one of the main causes of the difference between rich and poor
countries
Use synonyms
 is illiteracy and solving
this
Linking Words
 problem requires much effort from governments and international bodies. Together we could minimize the gap and circumstances better for poor
countries
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by jakedth162 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic disparity
  • crime rates
  • wealth inequality
  • social segregation
  • education gap
  • affluent
  • mortality rates
  • uneven access
  • hopelessness
  • disenfranchisement
  • progressive taxation
  • redistribute
  • quality education
  • social programs
  • economic disadvantage
  • higher wages
  • entrepreneurship
What to do next:
Look at other essays: