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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

How does social media affect us? State your opinion.

#media
It is 2021.
People
 of all ages are hooked on social
media
 with the constant urge to compete to find out who is better, who has the best body, best clothes, most followers/largest platform to the point where it's toxic.
People
 are constantly trying to compare themselves to others they see online, forgetting that it's all fake, eating themselves alive, developing disorders
such
 as anorexia, depression, body dysmorphia, and worst of all, suicidal thoughts.
People
 are blinded by numbers on the top of their page, constantly competing for clout or the satisfaction of having more followers than someone else. Social
media
 was
initially
 created to be a place to share your moments with the world, interact with
people
, and educate yourself. What is it now? A toxic and harmful place. I am not saying it's dangerous for everyone. No. It is,
however
, harmful for vulnerable and impressionable
people
 because of their weak willpower to control themselves. Blinded by someone else's body or displayed money,
people
 forget to see their own and appreciate it. They are desperate for others' validation rather than their own.
People
 go after unrealistic standards
such
 as a perfect face, height, posture, life. It's all an illusion everyone fails to see. With trends coming and going,
people
 tend to lose themselves trying to keep up. It's a hustle trying to get with the newest style or visit the newly famous selfie spot. Having said
this
, I am not trying to prove that social
media
 and solely social
media
 is ruining
people
's lives. It's
also
 what is called peer pressure that's adding to social
media
's harm. Kids of all ages pressure each other to do
this
 or to say that promising that it will go viral or that they will look "cool" doing so. Take vaping,
for example
. It became overly popular thanks to social
media
 influencers and peer pressure. Saying "it's not that bad" or "she's/hes doing it" or "it's "cool" and dong it for an Instagram picture or just because your friends are pressuring you to does not mean it's safe to do. In conclusion, social
media
 affects us and our lives in many ways, whether it's good or bad. It may boost your confidence or cause insecurities. Either way, it's good to detach from it once in a while and go back to reality.
Submitted by sargsyan_armine on

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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