It is more important to spend public money promoting a healthy lifestyle in order to prevent illness than to spend it on the treatment of people who are already ill. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

An often-debated topic is whether it is the responsibility of or others to financially
support
elderly
people
or individuals themselves should have saved money for their retirement. In my opinion, being a farsighted person is very crucial in
this
society.
However
, governments and other
people
should
also
give a hand in
this
regard to elderly
people
. In the following paragraphs, I would justify my
support
in
this
regard. Back
then
it was a convention that the
last
-born son should stay with his family after marriage. He was responsible for the financial
support
of the family, and his wife was responsible for doing chores and taking care of other family members.
As a result
, nobody was concerned about their
future
. But the situation has been changing differently, and today, children become
self-centered
Change the spelling
self-centred
show examples
. They do not want to sacrifice their comfort for taking care of their parents. So, for
this
reason,
people
should be concerned about their
future
and try not to be dependent on others. Looking forward to financially help from governments
also
should not make a person close their eyes to the reality due to the fact that the situation and legislation of a country are always changing so no one knows what going to happen in the
future
.
On the other hand
, governments should invest more in practices that are helpful for the aged population. Some basic amenities could be free for them to make sure they could survive without any other income. We should not forget that elderly
people
were a fruitful tree for our society some days, and try to
support
them in all aspects to make their lives convenient. To conclude, considering a part of the income as saving for the
future
could be a rational step.
However
, the government
also
has its own responsibility regarded to
this
matter.
Submitted by behnaz.babayani on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: