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Writing Samples
Band 7

Many people today do not feel safe either at home or when they are out. What are the causes? What are the solutions?

#people #home
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It is true that many
people
Use synonyms
 currently think that they are no longer safe both outside and inside their house.
This
Linking Words
 feeling is caused by some factors, and some solutions can help to allay those fears. There are at least two major reasons why
people
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 nowadays have to confront serious risks no matter when they are.
Firstly
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, the unemployment and the widening gap between the rich and the poor are crucial factors behind the rising crime rate in many nations,
hence
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 citizens have to be watchful all the time even when they stay at home. Vietnam,
for instance
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, has recently seen a significant increase in the number of
people
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 turning to crimes
such
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 as burglary and robbery in order to survive.
Secondly
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, when being out on the streets, everyone is aware of the dangers stemming from the dramatic increase in
traffic
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.
For example
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, the Global status report on road safety 2015 by the World Health Organization showed that around 1.25 million
people
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 worldwide die each year
as a result
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 of road
traffic
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 crashes. To solve these aforementioned problems, some measures should be implemented. The
first
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 measure would be to provide more job training programs to help
people
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 out of poverty and into employment, so they need to steal from others would be reduced and the public would feel safer.
Additionally
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, it is necessary to install surveillance cameras on trains and buses and along main roads because if there is close and regular supervision in
traffic
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, everyone who uses the roads will strictly obey
traffic
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 laws,
thus
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 the frequency of
traffic
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 accidents would be reduced in the long-term. In conclusion, it is clear that there are various reasons why society is unsafe and
people
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 are at risk even at home, and steps need to be taken to tackle
this
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 problem.
Submitted by andri.saputraozz on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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