IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Around the world, many adults are working from home, and more children are beginning to study from home because technology has become cheaper and more accessible. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.

#world #adults #home #children #study #technology #development #minutes
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technology
Use synonyms
 is something inevitable nowadays. in most
part
Fix the agreement mistake
parts
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 of the globe, many
people
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in
Change preposition
of
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 productive ages
are
Change the verb form
are working
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work
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 from their own house. the behaviour of the adults
people
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influence
Change the verb form
influences
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 more pupils to
also
Linking Words
doing
Wrong verb form
do
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tha
Correct your spelling
the
 same. they do their school activity from home because the
technology
Use synonyms
 become affordable in price and easy to access at the same time. in
this
Linking Words
 essay, I will explain my perspective
why
Change preposition
on why
show examples
this
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 is a good development and elaborate
some
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on some
show examples
 reasons behind
this
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 phenomenon. in my opinion,
technology
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 changes
people
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 behaviour.
subsequently
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,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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technology
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also
Linking Words
drive
Change the verb form
drives
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 the way
people
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work
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 and the
study
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 method of
children
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.
this
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 is a good movement. because
people
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
every
Correct quantifier usage
all
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ages
Change to a singular noun
age
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 have a space to adjust their
work
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 and
study
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 demand into
they
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 activity
in
Change preposition
on
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daily
Correct article usage
a daily
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 basis.
for example
Linking Words
, when
people
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are
Change the verb form
are working
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work
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 at the office, they must put their toddler into
babycare
Correct article usage
a babycare
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 institution.
nevertheless
Linking Words
, they spend more to pay
the
Change preposition
for the
show examples
 babycare service. meanwhile, when they
work
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 from home, they can
finished
Change the verb form
finish
show examples
 the task and care for
Correct your spelling
the
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they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
 baby at the same time. according to the example, I do believe
technology
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 brings
positive
Correct article usage
a positive
show examples
 impact. when we talk about the
children
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 and their school activity, I believe
Use synonyms
study
Wrong verb form
studying
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 from home is a good way in order to make
children
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 keep focus and do not get bored. to illustrate, when one day the
children
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are get
Change the verb form
are getting
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 bored
study
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 in their bedroom, the
next
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 day their parents can move
they
Correct your spelling
the
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 laptop into
living
Add an article
the living
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 room in order to give a new
ambiance
Change the spelling
ambience
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 for
children
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's home-classroom.
in addition
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,
this
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 fact
support
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supports
show examples
 my stance to see
technology
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 and flexibility are
positive
Add an article
a positive
show examples
 development.
finally
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,
technology
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 is a positive development. it gives
people
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 finished more than one responsibilities (
work
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 and family)
also
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 avoid the
children
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 from
get
Change the verb form
getting
show examples
 bored during their
study
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 class.
Submitted by serlyayus on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • remote work
  • telecommuting
  • work-life balance
  • environmental impact
  • socio-economic background
  • face-to-face interaction
  • interpersonal skills
  • productivity
  • reliable technology
  • quality of education
  • flexible schedule
  • cost savings
  • commuting
What to do next:
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