IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

some people believe that parents should teach their students to be good citizens ,however believe that school should do this .Discuss both views and give your opinion

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It is argued among some people that
parents
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 should have responsibility for teaching their child to be a good citizen. While
,
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apply
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 others think that
children
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 should be taught
such
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lesson
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lessons
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 in
school
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.
However
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, in
this
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 essay, both views will be discussed as well as my opinion will be given.
To begin
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 with, most
of
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apply
show examples
people
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the people
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 suggested that
parents
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 suppose to be the
first
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 trainer
to
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for
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 their kids. In view of the fact that
children
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 spend more years with their
parents
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 before going to
school
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.
Therefore
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, they needed to be trained by their guardian, on the basic level, about how to interact or socialize with others as well as how to become a good person and a good citizen.
On the other hand
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, some individuals believe that for
children
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 to become good citizens, a good
school
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's lesson is required.
For instance
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, some
parents
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 might not have enough time
spending
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to spend
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 or
looking
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look
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 after their kids. For
this
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 reason, they send the kids to
school
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 and
expecting
Wrong verb form
expect
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teacher
Fix the agreement mistake
teachers
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 to teach and prepare their
children
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 for both academic parts along with how to behave as a citizen. In my point of view, for a better result, I believe that both family and
school
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 should work
parallely
Correct your spelling
parallelly
parallel
.
For example
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, when
children
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 are at
school
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, it is a teacher's responsibility to teach them.
Also
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, when they are at home,
parents
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 should take over that task. In conclusion, some might think that the responsibility of teaching
children
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 to be good citizens is either on
parent's
Correct article usage
the parent's
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 hand or
teacher's
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the teacher's
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 hand.
However
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, I believe that it would be better for
children
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 if family and
school
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 could work together.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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