Wealth does not necessarily guarantee happiness. To what extent do you agree or disagree to this statement?

#wealth #guarantee #happiness

It is said that affluence is not the way that

people

could find enjoyment from

life

and it is strongly believed that there are so many reasons why it is in

second

place in all's

life

. My consideration is that individuals needs are other things

such

as health and

peace

Firstly

, there is a shred of evidence that one out of five

people

are wealthy or at least these human beings live in a desirable condition. Even though, not all have an acceptable

life

, due to the environmental problems which detrimentally affect them.

For instance

, there is a lot of information which is given by the World Health Organisation where they claim openly that 90 per cent of the public live in areas that are polluted by gas emissions. It means that almost all affluent

people

live in the same conditions as all populations.

Therefore

people

should take care of the environment in order to tackle

such

issues.

Secondly

, obviously, there is

also

one more issue which damages

people

life

and it is a war. It could be either between nations or countries which make all

people

anxious about their future.

Moreover

, even very rich

people

will think about their

peace

because if there is no

peace

then

businessmen could face bankruptcy. So it means that wealth is not crucial unless

people

do not live in

peace

Therefore

, society should be taught to live in friendship and support each other in many ways in order to not happen bad consequences. In conclusion, wealth is not an important warranty for happiness in

life

Thus

, my viewpoint is that all should have acceptable living conditions and

peace

in their lands in order to have a lot of money. It is claimed that it is better to have health than wealth.

Submitted by Ozy_boy on Thu Jan 20 2022

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

298 words

7.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Wealth does not necessarily guarantee happiness. To what extent do you agree or disagree to this statement?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Economic growth and development are usually considered to be beneficial both for individuals and for society as a whole. Do the advantages of economic development outweigh the disadvantages?