IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Technology causes more problems for modern society than it solves. Do you agree or disagree?

#technology #society
It is argued that more problems are created by modern automation than solutions. I genuinely disagree with
this
 assertion as I believe that technology is the way forward. Some people might argue that machinery can be used to harm people,
thus
 it should be described in a negative light. It is their belief that some countries today have the potential to use advanced technology to aid in warfare, not just in the physical world, but
also
 on the Internet. Developed nations of the world,
such
 as the USA and China, possess the power to devastate the less advanced sovereign countries by shutting down their power grids, hospitals and even their entire communications systems if push comes to shove.
This
 daunting prospect, some argue, can never outweigh the advantages computerization has to offer. Having said that, I am of the opinion that machinery has largely been a positive influence in our lives. The main positive impact it has had has been on the general quality of life through better healthcare, food, transportation, and communication. It is modern computerization that has enabled us to treat illnesses that were once thought to be incurable.
Furthermore
, the adoption of machinery in agriculture and factories is what has facilitated better yields and food processing, without which food shortage would be a more concerning problem than it is now.
Finally
, transportation and communication are two other aspects of our lives that have greatly been improved thanks to advances in automation. No longer do we have to waste time biking or sending letters when there are technologies that help us do these within a fraction of the time they would take. In conclusion, despite some downsides to accepting automation with open arms, I generally consider that were it not for technology we could not enjoy the privileges we have now.
Submitted by Florence on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • convenient
  • efficient
  • improved
  • communication
  • connectivity
  • advanced
  • medical treatments
  • saved lives
  • social problems
  • psychological problems
  • unemployment
  • income inequality
What to do next:
Look at other essays: