Some people think that advertising on TV is useless and others disagree. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

#people #tv

There is a debate between two different groups about whether promotion on

has any benefit,

while

others disagree with

this

hypothesis.

This

essay discusses both sides of

this

argument and why I believe that advertisement on

has many advantages. There are two main reasons why there is a group that believes that media owners should remove

promotions

from their establishment is because

that

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

televisions

Fix the agreement mistake

television

show examples

had

Verb problem

was

show examples

created for the purpose of entertainment.

Thus

, all the contents and programmes must be aligned with that purpose which is to entertain viewers from all over the world.

Furthermore

, no one would want to be interrupted by an advertisement when they are watching a movie with their family

this

is because it might distract the momentum.

Moreover

, many businessmen have agreed that advertising on television is an obsolete method, and

this

due to

social media. From a business viewpoint, firms started to shift their spending for marketing from TVs to platforms

such

as Instagram, Twitter, and

Tiktok

Correct your spelling

TikTok

show examples

On the other hand

, there is a consensus that believes that monetization on

is favourable.

Additionally

, the first reason why

this

group holds

this

notion is that

promotions

might educate

people

Not to mention

, sometimes advertisers promote products that could enhance the well-being of

people

and might save

individuals

Change noun form

individuals'

individual's

show examples

life. Despite the fact, that there were many great innovations no one knew about them until they were promoted on

As well as

this

, another good reason that sometimes advertisements might create cultural trends;

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

is to say, that these

promotions

will become part of someone's nostalgia.

For example

, many

people

will not forget the advertisement that was produced by Pepsi in the 2000s, the "What up!". In conclusion, I believe that both sides have merits. On balance,

however

, it is my opinion that I completely agree with the side that thinks that monetization on television is not useless.

This

is because these

promotions

could educate

people

on products that could make their

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

more efficient and easier.

Submitted by kofaisal on Wed Jan 26 2022

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coherence cohesion

In the introduction, ensure to clearly present both sides of the argument and your opinion. Develop each paragraph with strong topic sentences and supporting details. Use transition words to improve the flow of ideas between paragraphs.

task achievement

Ensure to address all parts of the essay prompt, including discussing the advantages and disadvantages of TV advertising and presenting a clear opinion. Provide more specific examples to support your points and ensure that each paragraph contributes to the overall argument.

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13Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

334 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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11 Most Commonly Used English Expressions »

Topic Vocabulary:

source of entertainment
relaxation
means of information
education
cultural awareness
negative influence
addiction
moderation
TV programs
documentaries
news
reality shows
soap operas
commercials

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