Should the government fund education and healthcare system? What is your opinion?

#government #fund #education #healthcare #system

There is a controversial notion heating a debate over the government’s expenditures. While some hold a view that

education

is the most pivotal part, the opposites make a statement that healthcare

also

plays an imperative role.

Although

each has its own perks, I would contend that it is ideal to combine both mentioned factors. It is apparently to note that

educational

Correct article usage

the educational

show examples

system plays a paramount significance in a

country

's flourishment which is worth making a national investment in. National development

Add a missing verb

is bases

show examples

bases

Wrong verb form

based

show examples

education

because it provides knowledge and skills for people which creates a qualified

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

workforce.

For instance

, the Netherlands abolishes tuition fees on a mass scale to encourage every resident to go to school which make its economy bloom strongly.

Thus

, sparing money on schooling is pivotal in the prosperity of a

country

. While the redeeming features of

education

are widely acknowledged, it is unfair if those of health protection

are

Change the verb form

show examples

ignored. Every person needs to have a good health condition to work effectively because they need

strong

Add an article

the strong

a strong

show examples

and lucid mind to create better value for their

country

. If people in a

country

are sick and tired,

this

country

will lack qualified

labors

Replace the word

labourers

show examples

to protect and build their nation,

then

become more vulnerable or even can be invaded.

Hence

, the healthcare system has a tremendous impact on a

country

’ development. In conclusion, both

education

and medical system is pivotal

Add a hyphen

in-country

show examples

country

evolution, so the governments should spend their money in a reasonable way for these two elements

Submitted by hominhtrang995 on Fri Jan 28 2022

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

249 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Should the government fund education and healthcare system? What is your opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Many people think that museums and art galleries should only show work from local artists rather than work from other countries. To what extent do you agree with this opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

many countries use fossil fuels such as coal or oil as the main sources of energy. however, in some countries the use of alternative sources of energy is encouraged. do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Many people who care for the elderly do not have enough time to look after them. What are the problems related to this? What are some possible solutions?

In many cities, there is little control on the design and construction of new houses. Some people think that people can choose to build houses in their own styles instead of building them the same as the old house style in local areas. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

A friend wants find a part time job to earn some money while studying. You have heard about a suitable job for your friend. Write a letter to this friend,in your letter, - describe the job - Explain why you think it is suitable for your friend. - Say what your friend should do to get this job.