Some people say that music is good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together? To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

I strongly agree with the statement. I believe that
music
can unify people from different sides of the globe and from all ages. To show that, nowadays, Korean Pop
Music
is popular globally and people from different countries follow
this
trend, even though they
are not speak
Change the verb form
do not speak
show examples
nor understand
Korean
Correct article usage
the Korean
show examples
languange
Correct your spelling
language
at all. A community of
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Korean Pop
musician
Fix the agreement mistake
musicians
show examples
or usually called 'fandom' gather to support their favourite,
although
they came from a completely different background. In my opinion,
music
is one of
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
communication
tools
Fix the agreement mistake
tool
show examples
. Musicians always make their
music
with the intention to express their feeling,
such
as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
anger, sadness, joy, and many more.
Hence
, people who listen to their
music
can feel the same and
became
Change the verb form
become
show examples
attached to the
music
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal language
  • evoke
  • connect
  • diverse audiences
  • cultural exchange
  • generational gaps
  • shared experiences
  • unifying force
What to do next:
Look at other essays: