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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some teachers think that international student exchange would be beneficial for all teenage school students. Do you think its advantages will outweigh the disadvantages?

Few educators advocate that the opportunities of overseas
education
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 are extremely useful
of
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for
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 the learning process of young ones. There are certain pros and cons of
this
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 development and I believe that the positives of
this
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 are far more than the negatives.
To begin
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 with, there are a few drawbacks to international scholar exchange programs. As
youg
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you
young
 ones are
way
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away
show examples
 from their homes, they have to face settlement issues
such
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 as they need to learn new languages and modify their
behaviors
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behaviours
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.
Moreover
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, they could easily develop homesickness that would have devastating impacts on their studies.
Furthermore
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, governments and parents need to spend a huge amount of money
for
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on
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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international
education
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, whereas, the educational
expanses
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expenses
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 in local institutes are very low.
For example
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, social issues, financial issues and separation from loved ones may cause nervous
break down
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breakdown
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 of
students
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 on foreign soil.
On the contrary
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, there are enormous gains to studying abroad.
First
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 and foremost,
this
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 helps to develop harmony among nations and ,as
students
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 learn about each other
culturs
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cultures
 and traditions.
Secondly
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, the
students
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 from developing countries get
chance
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a chance
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 to learn from the famous teachers in the developed world which would improve their standard of
education
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 and equally beneficial for their countries.
For instance
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, after their graduation from high ranked universities, the
students
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 from the
third
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 world could play
pivotal
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a pivotal
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rule
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role
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 to alleviate poverty and
improve
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improving
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 the lifestyle of people by serving in their home countries. In conclusion, even though overseas
students
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 have to face adjustment many challenges, standardized
education
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 and
bright
Correct article usage
a bright
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 future are the rewards of their
scarifices
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sacrifices
. I think that
this
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 phenomenon can minimize the differences among nations which would prevent fatal wars in the future

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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