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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this sets a bad example to young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#celebrities #glamour #wealth #achievements #sets #people
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In the present age,
celebrities
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 and influencers are gaining uneven fame and fortune compared with their achievement, some
people
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 believe it may pose a negative impact on the
next
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 generation, I tend to agree with
this
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 standpoint. On one hand, what we should admit is that when
celebrities
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 are gaining money and fame for their achievement, it encouraged more and more young
people
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 to emulate, while inspiring numerous youngsters to be more creative and enthusiastic,
as a result
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, we are witnessing the blooming time of the content creators in social networks.
such
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 as Tiktok and Youtube, loaded with creative young
people
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's posts that entertained the whole world.
On the other hand
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, it is particularly concerned that
instead
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 of focusing on the assiduous work behind the scenes, only disclosing the glamour and fortune of the
celebrities
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 may be harmful to social stability to a certain extent. especially when the media are paying too much attention to the harvest of
celebrities
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, ordinary
people
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 may fall into a sense of imbalance. Especially for the young
people
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 with immature thinking, they may complain and angry about their unsatisfaction in life and career, and even embark on the road of crime, as they are incited by
such
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 bad emotions. To sum up, the public paying too much attention to the fortune and fame of
celebrities
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 may act as an incite role,
However
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, it
also
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 leads to the psychological imbalance of the masses, which causes social instability and long-term brain drain in other industries.
Submitted by chaeunjun on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • glamour
  • wealth
  • achievements
  • portrayed
  • overshadow
  • influenced
  • lifestyles
  • unrealistic
  • expectations
  • values
  • promoting
  • hard work
  • perseverance
  • inspire
  • positive impact
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