There have been major advances in technology over recent decades and this has led to significant improvements in people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#advances #technology #decades #improvements #people’s #lives

People

have different opinions over whether the development of

technology

in contemporary society has increased

Correct article usage

the

show examples

standard of living or not. Regarding

this

, I strongly believe that

technology

has facilitated

people

to live a better life as it has influenced various industries

such

as education and healthcare. There are

cetrain

Correct your spelling

certain

reasons.

Firstly

people

have become healthier than before since medical

thechnology

Correct your spelling

technology

has helped individuals deal with illnesses. By using various equipment

such

as sensitive apparatus and robots, doctors can do organ

tranplantation

Correct your spelling

transplantation

, thereby leading to

extended

Correct article usage

an extended

show examples

life span. What is more, the public

are

Change the verb form

show examples

able to manage minor health issues

such

as diabetes and hypertension by themselves by checking blood sugar rates and blood pressure with technological devices.

For example

, a recent medical report would seem to suggest that almost 10% of lifespan has increased compared to 2 decades ago. As the example clearly illustrates,

technology

has played a key factor in improving

healthy

Correct article usage

a healthy

show examples

lifestyle.

Secondly

, the gap between the rich and the poor has decreased due to the chance

that is

provided

everyone

Change preposition

to everyone

show examples

justifiably. In the past, some students who lived in developing countries could not go to school as a lack of schools and transportation.

However

, in

this

day and age, not only can the Internet contributes to

students

Change noun form

students'

student's

show examples

study

Wrong verb form

studying

show examples

remotely in other countries, but it may

also

brings

Change the verb form

bring

show examples

about better educational chance among disabled children.

For instance

, a survey conducted by the Korea Educational Foundation has revealed that poor students have had more opportunities to make their future not to be worse.

Therefore

, it is reasonable to say that

technology

has reduced the disparity between

poor

Correct article usage

the poor

show examples

group and

rich

Correct article usage

the rich

show examples

group. In conclusion, there is no doubt to point out that

techonolgy

Correct your spelling

technology

has

increase

Change the verb form

increased

show examples

the standard of living as

people

has

Change the verb form

have

show examples

become

healtier

Correct your spelling

healthier

and

knowledgeable

Correct quantifier usage

more knowledgeable

show examples

Submitted by hiasince38 on Thu Mar 10 2022

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

297 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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There have been major advances in technology over recent decades and this has led to significant improvements in people’s lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The internet has transformed the way information is shared and consumed, but it has also created problems that did not exist before. What are the most serious problems associated with the internet and what solutions can you suggest?

There are more new towns nowadays, it is more important to include public parks and sports for individuals to spend their free time. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

All cars that burns fossil fuels should be banned and electric cars should replace them do you agree or disagree?

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a child’s development as other subjects, so it should be compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree of disagree?

Despite huge improvements in healthcare, the overall standard of physical health in many developed countries is now falling. What are the reasons for this and how can the problem be tackled?