IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Some people think that listening to music can be a useful way to improve the efficiency, but others believe that music distracts from daily routine. Give your opinion to this statement.

#people #music #efficiency #distracts
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As it is claimed by a proportion, listening to
music
Use synonyms
 may play a critical role to enhance effectiveness. While
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
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 have contradictory viewpoints, day-to-day activities in a spectrum of ways. Both claims have partial views and numerous reasons.
However
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, I mostly mingle with the former. It is not a misunderstanding that
music
Use synonyms
 may accelerate our inner effectivity because it may have altruistic hedonism value and
this
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 may
also
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 have pro-social behaviour and intellectual virtues.
For instance
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, most women are working when they are
tolistening
Correct your spelling
listening
to listening
Use synonyms
music
Change preposition
to music
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 due to
reduce
Change the verb form
reducing
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 their internal aggression.
Hence
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, listening to
music
Use synonyms
 may identify as medicine to defeating those negative emotional behaviours.
Furthermore
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,
music
Use synonyms
 may act as effective.
In contrast
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, others assert paradoxical claims, no doubt to some are addicting to
listen
Add the preposition
tolisten
show examples
music
Use synonyms
. There are no restrictions on it.
This
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 may physically, socially, mentally affect us. So, owing to various social and personal considerations sometimes I hold the pessimistic view of
this
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 statement because listening is the best addiction for those who have suffered any mental conditions.
For example
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, when crossing a road, people may use earplugs which may defeat any background noise due to the high volume of
music
Use synonyms
then
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 it would be an accident in light of
music
Use synonyms
 addiction, they may not be alert to the surrounding area.
Hence
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, it is readily apparent that
this
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 development may pose a huge threat to human beings.  In conclusion, addiction to
music
Use synonyms
 may perpetuate different positive conditions
such
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 as defeat loneliness and dull mood as well as it may pose enormous catastrophe for all human beings and the society due to the lack of alertness.
Submitted by Sandu  on

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