People should look after their health because this is a duty to the society not just a personal benefits. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #health #duty #society

It is often said that considering

health

is an obligation to society

instead

of a personal advantage. From my point of view ,I personally agree with

this

idea. I am going to explain some reasons below.

Firstly

,one of the main reasons is encouraging human beings to have a healthy

lifestyle

For example

,in most countries all around the world where people are accepting healthy things ,those who are not interested in having a healthy

lifestyle

prefer to obey

this

situation.

This

could help the community to accept

this

significant thing.

Moreover

this

could create a situation of being healthy among all human beings.

Therefore

this

makes it clear why

this

can bring some benefits to society rather than personal advantages.

Secondly

,another conspicuous reason is the impact on countries.

For instance

,we all know in some countries those who are suffering from some

health

problems

such

as obesity are not capable

to conduct

Change preposition

of conducting

show examples

their work effortlessly.

This

is a persuasive reason to consider having a healthy

lifestyle

is significant to the community.

Additionally

to accept

Verb problem

apply

show examples

looking after to

health

, can bring many upsides to areas where they settling .

As a result

,it becomes apparent there are numerous causes that can not be ignored. To summarise ,I strongly agree with the idea that having a healthy

lifestyle

is significant and necessary not just for individuals but

also

this

is crucial to society. It is recommended that governments and ordinary people start encouraging their residents to look after their

health

Submitted by maede.sadeghi8520 on Sat Mar 12 2022

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task response

To improve task response, ensure that you address all parts of the prompt clearly in your essay. Expand on the reasons why looking after health benefits society as a whole, not just individuals.

coherence and cohesion

To enhance coherence and cohesion, work on strengthening the introduction and conclusion of your essay. Make sure they clearly introduce and summarize the main points of your argument. Also, use transition words and phrases to improve the flow between paragraphs.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

251 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

duty
well-being
burden
healthcare systems
productive
economy
example
empower
informed choices

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People should look after their health because this is a duty to the society not just a personal benefits. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

There is a problem in your street. Write a letter to the local town council explaining who you are, what the problem is and what you hope will be done about it.

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Some people think that space exploration is a waste of resources. Others think that it is essential for mankind to continue to explore the universe in which we live. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The Internet has dramatically altered our lives over the past few decades. Although some of these changes have been negative, the overall effect of this technology has been positive. What are your opinions on this?