In some cultures , children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message.

There is no denying the fact that

kids

Use synonyms

can reach anything if they try hard enough.What are the advantages and the disadvantages of giving

children

Use synonyms

this

Linking Words

message? In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will analyse

this

Linking Words

topic from both points of view and express my opinion. There are a lot of advantages to teaching

children

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that they can achieve anything they want if they

work

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hard . On one hand , The

children

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will start to

work

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harder for their dreams.

In other words

Linking Words

Children

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will be dedicated .

In addition

Linking Words

, They even can successfully achieve what they

work

Use synonyms

for and it can excite them to practice for what they are doing or planning to do .

For example

Linking Words

, Elon Musk has been a hard worker since he was a teenager and in his 20s he had Microsoft company . It was all Led with the help of his family . There are a lot of disadvantages of not telling your child they can achieve whatever if they

work

Use synonyms

hard .

On the other hand

Linking Words

, The kid will not believe in himself and his self-confidence will be horrible. It is

also

Linking Words

impossible for

kids

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to achieve things if they don't have self-confidence.

Moreover

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

would affect the kid .

For example

Linking Words

Kids

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these days their parents do not help them and teach them that they should

work

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hard so they can get whatever they want. It can lead to an unsuccessful career. In conclusion, I believe that

kids

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must be told that they can achieve whatever if they

work

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hard since they are young so it helps them develop their skills.

yaseralshehri2Sun Jun 08 2025

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task achievement

Make sure to clearly explain the advantages and disadvantages with more details in each point. This will help make your ideas clearer.

coherence and cohesion

Try to use linking words more effectively to connect your ideas. For example, use 'however' to show contrast clearly between points.

task achievement

Revise the examples to ensure they are relevant and clearly support your argument. Make sure to explain them in a way that connects them to your points directly.

task achievement

The introduction clearly states the topic and your opinion. This sets a good starting point for your essay.

task achievement

You made a good attempt to include examples to support your ideas. This shows you are trying to provide evidence for your points.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

achieve
try hard
positive mindset
self-belief
motivates
ambitious goals
resilience
determination
confidence
self-esteem
growth mindset
unrealistic expectations
disappointment
failure
effort
hard work
seek support
individual differences
abilities
capabilities

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In some cultures , children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Some people believe that elderly parents ought to live at senior homes. Others believe that they should live with family members(blood relatives). Do you agree or disagree?

Happiness is considered very important in life. Why is it difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness ?

Fewer young people play sports these days. Why is this? What can be done to encourage more young people to do sports?

Some people say that distance learning is a quick and effective way to study. Others, however, disagree and say that distance learning programs can never be as good as courses taken in person. Do you agree or disagree with the statement?

Some people think that global environmental problems should be dealt with globally. Others think that they should be solved locally. What is your opinion?