Some people believe that children should stay at school until 18 years old. However, other people believe they should be allowed to leave school for age of 14. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #children #school #years #age

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There has been quite an obvious discussion around the topic of mandatory schooling.

While

some people believe that pupils should be allowed to leave

school

at the age of 14, I would argue that

children

should stay at

school

until year 12 because of education and qualifications. I will explain my reasons in

this

essay. There is no doubt that

children

should be allowed to leave

school

until the age of 14 so that they can get a job faster.

This

is because pupils can not afford their money for higher education, and they can decide to leave

school

and look for a job to support themselves and their families.

For example

, the rural areas in India, some

children

have to leave

school

before they

graduate

from high

school

, and they can have a job to earn money and support their finances.

As a result

, higher schooling requires various money to spend and not everyone can afford it.

However

, it is worth pointing out that

children

should stay at

school

until they

graduate

from high

school

This

is based on the fact that education until high

school

are generally basic schooling that can provide certainly jobs and universities require.

For instance

Chulalongkorn

Change preposition

at Chulalongkorn

show examples

University in Thailand, there is required for students who must

graduate

in year 12 if they would like to study at

this

university.

Consequently

, a high

school

degree opens the door to universities and opportunities at work in the future. In conclusion, we can observe that some

children

should be allowed to leave

school

until the age of 14 so that they can look after themselves and their families financially.

Overall

, I firmly believe that it is a better way for

children

to continue studying until they

graduate

at yea

Submitted by v.mahatkomol on Mon Apr 22 2024

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task achievement

Ensure your essay has a clear conclusion. It appears your essay was cut off before fully concluding your thoughts. A conclusion should summarize your main points and clearly state your opinion.

coherence cohesion

Keep your essay well-organized. Use clear paragraphing and ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea supported by examples or explanations.

coherence cohesion

Expand on your introduction to more clearly state the essay's topic and hint at your opinion. This helps set up your essay's structure and provides a clearer guide for the reader.

task achievement

Make sure to address both sides of the argument comprehensively before stating your conclusion. While you've provided some contrast between the views, ensuring balance and thorough exploration of each side enhances your argument's strength.

task achievement

You’ve provided relevant examples to support your arguments, which strengthens your essay.

coherence cohesion

Your essay flows well, with logical progression from one idea to the next, which makes it easy to follow.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

292 words

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Some people believe that children should stay at school until 18 years old. However, other people believe they should be allowed to leave school for age of 14. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In the modern age, some people think it is unnecessary to teach children the skill of handwriting. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that formal education should start for children as early as possibl. While others think that it should not start until 7 years of age. Discuss both views and give your opinio.

It is important for people to take risks both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risk outweigh the disadvantages. Give reasons for your answer and give relevant answer.