IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4

Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others believe that some information is too important or too valuable to be shared freely. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #information #research #business #world
The
information
 in scientific
research
, business, and the academic
world
 has been improving the development of many global aspects. Due to the accessibility issues, it is proposed that the
information
 should be accessed freely.
However
, rejections
also
 come to
this
 idea as it is perceived that the
information
 is too important and too valuable to be accessed freely. In my view, the proposal of giving
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
free
access
 to scientific
research
 is strongly worth to be implemented. Despite my opinion,
this
 essay will elaborate
both
Change preposition
on both
show examples
 aspects of
this
 discussion. It is true that some
information
 is too valuable to be freely given. To publish a journal in a leading journal publisher in the
world
, it is undeniable that the publishing fee is not cheap. Not only publishing fee, the sacrificed times and efforts
also
 costs the
scientist
 with the arms and legs. Paid
access
 to the scientific journal will give the incentive to
researcher
Correct article usage
the researcher
show examples
 and will keep the quality of the journal. Despite
of
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
the mentioned benefit of paid
access
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
scientific
research
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
free
access
also
 makes a lot of promising
benefit
Change to a plural noun
benefits
show examples
. As we know, the purpose of scientific
research
 is to spread the newest ideas,
innovation
Fix the agreement mistake
innovations
show examples
, and contribute more to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. Qualified
research
 is important in developing nations and formulating
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
regulations. It already runs in
scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
show examples
 to give their best to spread the knowledge. With free
access
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 scientific journals, all can reach the same knowledge from different parts of the
world
. A study in Oxford can be read by people in Indonesia and it can influence
other
Change the wording
another scientist
other scientists
show examples
scientist
 to dip more about the
research
. It opens many expectant collaborations and
innovation
Fix the agreement mistake
innovations
show examples
 between
scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
show examples
 all over the
world
. To be concluded, the idea of spreading the
information
 in
scientific
Add an article
a scientific
show examples
 journal as a free thing is a great idea to be executed.
Submitted by nadita.ayudya on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • information sharing
  • scientific research
  • business
  • academic world
  • advancement of knowledge
  • progress
  • collaboration
  • cross-disciplinary research
  • open access
  • democratization of information
  • transparency
  • credibility
  • intellectual property
  • security concerns
  • commercial interests
What to do next:
Look at other essays: