These days, too many people maintain their health by relying on doctors and medicine, rather than by following a healthy lifestyle. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the recent world, numerous individuals are choosing to maintain their health by following the
doctors
' opinion or taking medicine more than changing their
lifestyle
to become healthier. From my point of view, I disagree with the idea that
people
rely only on
doctors
or medicine rather than changing their
lifestyle
to become healthier. In the following paragraphs, the reasons to support my opinion will be outlined in detail.
Firstly
, it is true that
people
are going to
doctors
but rather than rely everything on
doctors
, I would rather say that they are going to find guidelines or to know their health status so that they will know what their body is insufficient or need more caution on so that they could improve for on their
lifestyle
.
For instance
,
people
are going for checkups and they know that the vitamin D level of their body is lower than average. They can improve their
lifestyle
to run early in the morning as morning sunlight has vitamin D.
Secondly
, exercising has become more popular in society. These activities reflect the importance of a healthy
lifestyle
that
people
are reminded of.
For example
, in Thailand, many teenagers are going to fitness or doing some exercise to make their heartbeat on a high level so that the blood could flow easier.
Moreover
, to burn their fats and build muscle so their body is maintained in shape and strong. In conclusion, even though
people
are going to
doctors
or taking some supplements, it has disagreed that
people
are not changing their
lifestyle
to become healthier.
People
are using
doctors
for guidelines or taking supplements in the area that their health needs to be improved which in my opinion, it is one of the healthy lifestyles
people
should have done.
Submitted by nuanpan.aumm on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

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Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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