In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #hobby #trend

With the development of science and technology,

people

nowadays have a lot of approaches to

satisfied

Wrong verb form

satisfy

show examples

themself,

such

traveling

Change the spelling

travelling

show examples

, shopping, sailing, and so on. It is often suggested that more and more

people

like to consider

purshasing

Correct your spelling

purchasing

as a hobby rather than a daily work. In my own opinion, it is a positive trend.

This

can probably improve the relationship between families and friends, and the changed shopping style will reduce the waste to a certain degree.

This

essay with

discuss

Change the verb form

discusses

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the reasons.

Firstly

compare

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compared

show examples

with a routine task

need

Correct pronoun usage

that need

show examples

to be done, the

changed

Replace the word

changing

show examples

shopping experience would

makes

Change the verb form

make

show examples

people

feel happy and they

also

like to invite others to go shopping together.

For example

, women may make an appointment to go to Costco together; and during the wandering time, they would like to have a cup of coffee to increase their good relationships.

However

, if they all have their own routine time, they can hardly sit together to have a warm conversation.

As a result

, it is obvious that

this

new purchasing experience not only can finish the daily job

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

impove

Correct your spelling

improve

their life quality and become

more nice

Replace the words

nicer

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with

people

around.

Secondaly

Correct your spelling

Secondly

Secondary

people

may buy goods

wth

Correct your spelling

with

show examples

higer

Correct your spelling

higher

quality and

Correct your spelling

lower

show examples

loser

Correct your spelling

lower

show examples

price

Fix the agreement mistake

prices

show examples

if they do the shopping as a hobby since they are willing to spend more time

Change preposition

apply

show examples

researching

Change preposition

apply

show examples

them. For

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

instance, girls would like to compare the prices and

qulities

Correct your spelling

qualities

around several shops for a specific dress.

Therefore

, they may get a perfect experience and get the exact goods they like.

Change preposition

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

conclusion, it is clear that

people

could spend less money on their life and even get better

Correct your spelling

lives

life

lifes

Correct your spelling

lives

show examples

with these new hobbies,

instead

of considering

Correct pronoun usage

it as

show examples

a job. In conclusion, with the reasons talked above,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

good relationships and better life qualities can be seen as

main

Correct article usage

the main

show examples

reasons for

this

argument that it is a positive trend that

consider

Change the verb form

considers

show examples

shopping activities as hobbies rather than routine jobs.

Submitted by ifrankxue on Tue Mar 22 2022

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

328 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Too many young people and too many old people do not exercise enough. What is causing this ? What can be done to change this ? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your knowledge or experience.

Full time university students spend most of their time behind academic subjects. Some people say that they should engage in other activities also. To what extend do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, traveller can go to distant and remote areas such as North Pole. What are advantages and disadvantages?

Many people believe that we should protect all wild animals while others believe we should just protect some of them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.