Some people believe that longer prison sentences are the best way to decrease crime while others believe that there are alternative ways to decrease crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #prison #sentences #decrease #crime #alternative

Crime

has become a concerning topic in most countries and many

people

have their own opinion on tackling

this

problem. Some

people

think that longer

jail

sentences

are the best way to reduce

crime

while others think there are other ways to tackle it. In

this

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

I will discuss both views, and give my opinion as to why offering jobs to

criminals

and keeping them on probation is the best way to

decrease

crime

. Many

people

believe that giving

criminals

longer prison

sentences

will reduce

crime

because when they get longer

sentences

the streets will be with

less

Change the quantifier

fewer

show examples

criminals

hence

, less

crime

This

will

also

deter other

criminals

from

commiting

Correct your spelling

committing

the same

crime

as they know what consequences to expect.

For instance

, if robbers are put in

jail

for a longer period of time, the streets will be safe until they are released from

jail

This

will not

gurantee

Correct your spelling

guarantee

that the criminal will do the same offence again.

This

is why alternative methods should be introduced to

decrease

crime

. Some

people

, including me, think that

shorter

Correct article usage

a shorter

show examples

prison sentence and offering

criminals

a job like community service will reduce

crime

. When a person goes to

jail

for a long time, he or she will have to handle the lawyer charges as well as help their family with an income. It is more likely that

this

person is going to rob again.

Therefore

giving

criminals

small jobs,

for example

enviornment

Correct your spelling

environment

maintainace

Correct your spelling

maintenance

will

decrease

crime

while helping the criminal's family and pay off any debts. In conclusion,

crime

is indeed a hot topic around the world but many

people

think that longer prison

sentences

will

decrease

it. Alternative methods must be

implimented

Correct your spelling

implemented

into the law to help both the community as well as the

criminals

This

will lead to a safer place to live in for all of us.

Submitted by kapileshr8 on Thu Mar 24 2022

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

307 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that longer prison sentences are the best way to decrease crime while others believe that there are alternative ways to decrease crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Organizing tours to promote places and communities is becoming more and more popularity. Is it positive or negative development for the local people and environment？

University education should be free for all students. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The number of overweight children in developed countries is increasing. Some people think this is due to problems such as the growing number of fast food outlets. Others believe that parents are to blame for not looking after their children's health. To what extent do you agree with these views?