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Writing Samples
Band 7

Many countries spend a lot of money in art. Some people think investment in art is necessary, but others say money is better spent on improving health and education. Discuss both arguments and give your opinion

#countries #money #art #people #investment #health #education #arguments
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It is not uncommon for the
government
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 to invest in the
art
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field
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 under the circumstance when various forms of
art
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 had merged as an integral part of our daily life, and they are consciously and subconsciously shaping our sense of beauty. Whereas, a section of society frequently argued that funds should be spent on the
health
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 and education system
instead
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. I am not totally on their side, as per my standpoint, investing in the
art
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field
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 is as important as in
health
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 and education.
Firstly
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, one of the most noticeable advantages of
art
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 brought to people is calmness in mind, it is critical to people's mental
health
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 that will not be less significant than their physical
health
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. When people were trunk in anxiety, pressure, or any other negative moods, being exposed to the world of
art
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 will present peace in their inner minds.
However
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, not everyone is available to get to those famous museums in big cities,
such
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 as Paris, London, and Newyork, so it is essential for their local
government
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 to invest money to build more
art
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 museums, exhibitions, or launch other kinds of campaigns with
art
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.
Consequently
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, I totally agree with the opinion that spending adequate money on the
art
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field
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 is necessary. On the other side, another benefit is that
this
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 can decrease the expenses for citizens to participate in different arts, which can contribute more talented artists to society.
For example
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, the Japanese
government
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 created different kinds of anime to develop children's interest in designing. It said that an anime named [ Oh,
Design
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] attracted millions of adolescents to pursue a career in
design
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, which will
further
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 enhance their advantages in most industries related to
design
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,
such
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 as car
design
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, clothes
design
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, electric gadgets
design
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, and so on. Obviously,
art
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 is crucial in the modern world, especially in globalised times. And
thus
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, I personally think investing in the
art
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field
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 can urge the development of the economy. Overall, spending money on
health
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 and education is fundamental for a country,
similarly
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, the
art
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field
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 should be given priority as well.
Government
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 and society will benefit from their investment in the
art
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field
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 in a long run, and hopefully, there will be more politicals are aware of
this
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 point.
Submitted by zhouhao on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • vital part
  • culture and heritage
  • attracting tourists
  • promote diversity
  • foster creativity
  • fundamental needs
  • directly impact
  • economic performance
  • productive workforce
  • widespread benefits
  • solid foundation
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