Success is often measured by wealth and material belongings. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success? What makes a successful person?

#success #wealth #belongings #measure #person

this

materialism

Replace the word

materialistic

show examples

world, society tends to measure

people

’s

success

by fortune and materiality. In my opinion, I strongly agree that because

success

always brings treasure as well as luxury material

life

people

and I believe that environment generates a person who will be successful.

To begin

with,

success

brings

money

and luxury

life

people

automatically when we are

successed

Correct your spelling

succeeded

succeed

successes

. As many famous and popular careers are created by

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

individuals, they own a great number of

money

and

also

acquire reputations.

For instance

, FaceBook, Taobao and Alibaba are established by successful

people

and

brings

Correct subject-verb agreement

bring

show examples

huge

money

to them.

Thus

successful

Add an article

a successful

the successful

show examples

person

Fix the agreement mistake

people

show examples

always

have

Change the verb form

has

show examples

great fortune and luxury materials accompany

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

them.

In addition

, plenty of successful

people

are made by their growing environment wich are poverty or rich. Personally speaking,

environment

Add an article

an environment

the environment

show examples

which

are

Change the verb form

show examples

educations

Fix the agreement mistake

education

show examples

, families and friends, encouraging them to do hobbies or finding potential skills impacts individuals who achieve

success

Morovere

Correct your spelling

Moreover

, poverty situation

influence

Correct subject-verb agreement

influences

show examples

individuals

Fix the infinitive

to be

show examples

Change the verb form

are

show examples

full

Change preposition

apply

show examples

ambitious, they long

money

Change preposition

for money

show examples

to have

great

Add an article

a great

show examples

life

;

hence

, they will try any method to acquire

successfulness

Replace the word

success

show examples

For example

, one of my

friend

Change to a plural noun

friends

show examples

had his own career now, because

Change preposition

apply

show examples

his parent always supported and encouraged him to do anything. Enhance, a person’s

successfulness

Replace the word

success

show examples

is influenced by different

life

situations and

people

who

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

around them. To sum up, some

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people

not

Change the verb form

do not

did not

show examples

agree that measure

success

by how

many

Correct quantifier usage

much

show examples

fortune

Change to a plural noun

fortunes

show examples

and materials they owned, but I firmly agree that, because

those successful person

Change the determiner

that successful person

those successful people

show examples

who

Change the pronoun

whom

show examples

we knew are owned huge wealth and good materials, and

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

life

situations how effects them.

Submitted by Nikky on Tue Apr 05 2022

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
31Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

263 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Success is often measured by wealth and material belongings. Do you think wealth is the best measure of success? What makes a successful person?

There are serious concerns about the sale and production of genetically modified food. Yet this is necessary if we are to meet the demands often increasing world population. Give your opinions on this.

More and more animal species are becoming extinct by human activities in land and sea. What are the reasons and solutions?

Nowadays many people choose to be self-employee rather than to work for a company or organization. Why might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self-employed?

Human activities have negative effects on plants and animals all over the world. Some people think it is too late to do something about it. Others think there is still some time to take actions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many cities are now turning parks and farmland into new housing developments