Some people think that sport has an important role in society. Others think it is only a leisure activity for some people. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

#people #sport #role #society #leisure #activity

Nowadays, there is much controversy over the role of

sport

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society. Some

people

argue that it is an integral part of humans' lives while others believe that

the

Change the word

its

show examples

only

porpuse

Correct your spelling

purpose

of it is to fill our leisure

time

. It is noteworthy to bear in mind that doing sports is a wise choice for humans' free

time

;

however

, I believe the importance of it is not limited only to entertaining

people

due to

benefits

Correct article usage

the benefits

show examples

it has brought for us. The following essay will overlook both views which are proceeding with my opinion. On one hand, various types of

sport

are available which can be compatible with not only different

people

's lifestyles but

also

distinct neighbourhoods' facilities, which

fulfill

Change the spelling

fulfil

show examples

all needed

criterias

Correct your spelling

criteria

to be a great choice for leisure activities .

For example

, by establishing a swimming pool in a neighbourhood, the old generation of that area find it the best place to spend their free

times

Fix the agreement mistake

time

show examples

with their peers.

Therefore

sport

Add an article

the sport

show examples

has always been viewed as the best

hobbies

Fix the agreement mistake

hobby

show examples

due to its wide options based on humans' preferences and abilities.

On the other hand

, the necessity of physical activities for mankind to be healthy might make it a more important part of our lives than just hobbies.

For instance

twenthy

Correct your spelling

twenty

-three minutes of daily exercise can reduce the risk of heart attacks to a half.

Consequently

, as public health should be located above all, dedicating more than leisure

time

to do sports should be considered by all. To sum up,

sport

Add an article

the sport

show examples

has been playing an increasingly important role in mankind's life.

Although

it can be the best hobby that a person can

chose

Change the verb form

choose

show examples

, I believe having a routine exercise that specifies more

time

than our off days to itself is required for

people

to remain healthy.

Submitted by panizfathi70128 on Wed Apr 06 2022

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

296 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

national unity
physical health
mental health
social change
gender equality
social integration
disadvantaged communities
cultural barriers
escapism
commercialization
viewership
merchandise sales
inclusivity
accessibility
nationalistic fervor
racism
marginalization

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Some people think that sport has an important role in society. Others think it is only a leisure activity for some people. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

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