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Band 6.5

Governments are prohibiting underage children from getting full time jobs in certain countries. Do you agree or disagree?

#governments #children #time #jobs #countries
Nowadays, youngsters have been doing jobs along with their education has common in all countries. In specific regions, minors obtaining long hours of
work
 is prohibited by the administration.
Change preposition
In my
show examples
My opinion
Correct pronoun usage
Opinion
show examples
, I firmly agree with the statement.
To begin
 with, I would consider numerous factors to advocate my viewpoint.
Firstly
, the juveniles who go for full day labour are harmful to both their studies and future earning potential.
In addition
 to
this
,they are unable to concentrate on school homework or assignments because of the demands of workload.
As a result
, many perform poorly, are held back and forced to repeat grades, or drop out altogether. To illustrate, In some villages, most young boys and girls have to go to labour
work
 for essential needs due to their family's poverty. In
this
 case, they can not put their focus on their studies.
Moreover
, adolescents who enter the workforce at an early age end up with less education and lower earnings as adults. Above and beyond, there are a few other aspects
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 strengthen
this
 opinion, one
such
 aspect is the administration should mention the minimum age period of employment above 16 years or after completion of schooling. Apart from
this
, alleviating family poverty and increasing access to schooling will do more to improve the lives of youths than allowing minor children to
work
.
Finally
, schoolgoers can benefit from
work
 even if they are below the lowest age set for half-day
work
instead
 of a full day. To summarize, I am of the opinion that considering the current scenario, the ministry should be forbidden from having full-day occupations for immature children.
Submitted by Sulochana.kante on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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