Caring for children is an important thing of the society. It is suggested that all mothers and fathers should be required to take childcare training courses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Children
are the future of society. They can able to turn a new way. Many Use synonyms
people
argue that every parent Use synonyms
need
a training Change the verb form
needs
course
for childcare Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
in
good
manner. I totally agree with Correct article usage
a good
this
statement and I will discuss Linking Words
in
the upcoming paragraphs.
Correct pronoun usage
it in
To begin
with, nowadays many Linking Words
parents
are doing Use synonyms
job
day to night so at that time their Correct pronoun usage
their job
children
are alone at Use synonyms
the
home. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, in the modern era mother and Linking Words
father
both Add a comma
father,
are working
from 7 a.m to 8 p.m job in any company. Wrong verb form
work
However
, they have no time for Linking Words
of
spring to learn things like manners and how to talk with Change preposition
apply
the
older Correct article usage
apply
people
. So, Use synonyms
Change preposition
for those
those reason
, Change the determiner
that reason
those reasons
parents
should be essential to the childcare training courses. Use synonyms
Linking Words
Although
, in Correct word choice
However
this
Linking Words
course
, they learn new things Use synonyms
Linking Words
likewise
how to treat our seeds, how to control them and so on. Rephrase
such as
As a result
, their Linking Words
children
are Use synonyms
treating
properly and behave as Wrong verb form
treated
a
good Correct article usage
apply
person
. Fix the agreement mistake
people
Therefore
, every mother and father should join the childcare training Linking Words
course
.
Use synonyms
Furthermore
, we know Linking Words
about
in the Change preposition
that
present-day
, Correct your spelling
present day
the
Correct article usage
apply
children
Use synonyms
are used
Wrong verb form
use
a
very rough language Correct article usage
apply
while
they are talking with their Linking Words
parents
Use synonyms
for
friends. Correct your spelling
or
For instance
, in the modern era, seeds have no manners how Linking Words
to communicate
with other Change the verb form
communicating
people
. Use synonyms
As a result
, they are going Linking Words
wrong
way and playing with their future, Add an article
the wrong
as well as
careers. Linking Words
However
, when the age of Linking Words
children
is small at that time Use synonyms
parents
should take part in the training Use synonyms
course
and treat their Use synonyms
children
.
Use synonyms
To conclude
, for Linking Words
the
better life and Correct article usage
a
good
career, Correct article usage
a good
the
Correct article usage
apply
manner
Fix the agreement mistake
manners
is
play a vital role in life. Unnecessary verb
apply
Hence
, Linking Words
parents
should join training courses and treat their Use synonyms
of
spring to how to behave with other Replace the word
off
people
.Use synonyms
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coherence cohesion
Try to improve the logical flow of ideas. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that your arguments are well-supported with relevant examples.
task achievement
Avoid repetition; try to use a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to express the same ideas.
language
Work on grammatical accuracy, particularly with verb forms, subject-verb agreement, and article usage.
task achievement
You have a clear opinion and try to support it throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
Introduction and conclusion are present, providing some structure to your essay.