At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages ?

#time #population #countries #adults #people #situation

Over the past decades, the world has evolved substantially in population. Nowadays, the number of young

people

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

more than elderly

people

in some countries. There are both positive and negative aspects to

this

trend.

This

essay will seek to examine the complex

issule

Correct your spelling

issue

. On the one hand, I would like to point out that there are various reasons to consider getting advantages of youngster's

power

. Best of all, having

Correct your spelling

numerous

numerious

Correct article usage

a numerious

show examples

amount of young adults in a

country

may develop the hope of that

country

For example

, the government can be pleased with their young and robust workforce in every sector.

Moreover

, if the work authorities can lead their youth

power

into

Change preposition

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

correct track, the development of that nation will be unbelievably increased. In fact, we could say the

developing

Replace the word

development

show examples

rate of a

country

is directly

propotionate

Correct your spelling

proportionate

proportional

to their amount of young

power

On the other hand

, I would like to express an equal view that there are several drawbacks of losing older

people

First

of all, we should not underestimate the essential facts of older

people

although

having youngsters in the

country

is important.

For instance

, senior citizens may be weaker in terms of work rate but the value of their

precious

Correct your spelling

show examples

experience and expertise

are

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show examples

undeniable to discuss in

this

topic.

Additionally

, the lower ratio of older

people

in a

country

describes the status of that

country

's inabilities in health sectors,

such

as having shorter life

spands

Correct your spelling

spans

spends

and more generation gaps. In conclusion,

although

we have some different opinions and notions, I passionately believe that having more youngsters in a

country

's working network is

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

preferable

than

Change preposition

show examples

having

knowledges

Change the wording

knowledge

pieces of knowledge

bits of knowledge

show examples

without no

acutual

Correct your spelling

actual

working

power

Submitted by tunnaungwin11 on Fri May 06 2022

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

277 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

demographic
workforce
productivity
innovation
skilled labor
social development
technology
dividend
competition
resources
social welfare
unrest
instability
healthcare
elderly care

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At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages ?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

some poeple think that children should onle read academic book.other believe that reading books for pleasure is equally improtant.Disvuss both view and give your opinion.

Today more people are overweight than ever before. What in your opinion are the primary causes of this? What are the main effects of this epidemic?

It is often said that crime is one of the main things that make the quality of life poorer. Crime in developed countries is one of the biggest problems in society. What are the causes of this problem and what measures can be taken to reduce it?

Some people think that the main purpose of schooling is to turn children into good citizens and workers, rather to begin them as individuals. To what extent do you agree or disagree?