A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#person’s #status #possessions #values #honour #kindness #trust

Nowadays, materialism is taking the main place which held up

society

. In fact, a study performed on a global level

last

year stated that for the majority of

people

, the social position of a person is more important than his social behaviour. I strongly believe that the reason for

this

rising trend is the increase of possibilities to show ourselves in a virtual world. In

this

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

I will outline why I think that

this

superficial point of view is increasing in our

society

and

then

I will analyse a possible solution for

this

problem. We cannot deny that one of the main causes of the loss of fundamental values is the spread of social networks. Indeed, social networks,

such

as Instagram or Facebook, base their existence on external characteristics.

Furthermore

, with the current technological instruments, it is possible to modify our look.

This

allows us to show a different version of ourselves and brings

people

to concentrate even more on their external look. external characteristics.

Furthermore

, with the current technological instruments, it is possible to modify our look.

This

allows us to show a different version of ourselves and brings

people

to concentrate even more on their external look. So, despite social networks having many positive aspects, they surely induce

people

to concentrate more on their aspects than on their values.

However

, I think it is still possible to find a solution to

this

issue. Indeed our

society

should be more educated in communication and in a social

network

Fix the agreement mistake

networks

show examples

as a whole. So, a possible way to resolve

this

problem could be to inform the young generation about the risk that the internet could represent.

Therefore

, they will know that what they see in the virtual world is not an important aspect of our life. In conclusion, the diffusion of a very dangerous culture is a problem that our

society

should seriously face. Anyway, it's not impossible to avoid

this

risk. Indeed, an effective way is to educate young to beware of those wrong behaviours, whereas they should concentrate on what really counts: the fundamental values

such

as honour, kindness and trust

Submitted by sidramassri47 on Sun May 15 2022

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

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‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

352 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Social status
Material possessions
Old-fashioned values
Honour
Kindness
Trust
Judged
Importance
Traditional
Reflection
Achievements
Hard work
Disregarded
Well-balanced
Meaningful
Cultural norms
Societal norms

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A person’s worth nowadays seems to be judged according to social status and material possessions. Old-fashioned values, such as honour, kindness and trust, no longer seem important. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Nowadays businesses face problems with new employees who just finished their education and lack some interpersonal skills such as the ability to work in a team. What do you think is the main cause of the problem? How can it be resolved?

Some believe that children nowadays have too much freedom. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Despite a large number of gyms, a sedentary lifestyle is gaining popularity in the contemporary world. What problems are associated with this? What solutions can you suggest?

In many large cities, people waste hours of their time every day because of traffic congestion on the roads. What are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?