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Band 6

Some people think that young people should be required to do unpaid work helping people in the community. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#people #work #community
It is argued that young adults must get involved in the local
community
 without getting paid. While there are several benefits to
such
 activities, these are outweighed by the drawbacks.  Though young people do not receive any kind of direct remuneration, doing volunteer
work
 may help them mentally prepare for the life of an adult.
Firstly
, teenage volunteers may learn to become more responsible. Most people at these ages are still heavily reliant on their parents and teachers.
Therefore
, taking part in
community
work
 means they are entering a new
work
 environment with little supervision
of
Change preposition
from
show examples
 parents and teachers;
in other words
, they are given a chance to stand on their own.
Furthermore
, helping other people can make their lives more fulfilled. It is true that the need to contribute and be recognized is universal and should not be limited to adults, and for teens through
community
work
,
this
 need can be met.
However
, the benefits appear less significant than the drawbacks. On the one hand, many teenagers are already burned out with schoolwork and homework, which are as demanding as a full-time job. If they are obliged to do unpaid
work
,
this
 can create a negative impression that their life is nothing but duties.
This
 suggests that the rest of their time should be spent on their hobbies to help them find school-life balance.
On the other hand
, as students’ time and capacity
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 still limited, society only gains insignificant benefit from their contribution to
community
work
. What they can support the
community
 at
this
 point may be just some simple paperwork and errands, and two hours of volunteering a week,
for instance
, is not enough to make a change. In conclusion, though it can benefit young adults to do unpaid
community
 service to some extent,
this
 should not be made compulsory for all.
Submitted by studywithmee.2022 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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