IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Some schools put the most advanced students in separate classes from their peers so they can study more challenging materials.

#schools #students #classes #peers #study #materials
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Nowadays ,some authorities think that it is more favourable in some educational centres to separate better
students
 in other special
classes
 and give them difficult materials.
This
 essay will argue that the advantages of
this
 outweigh the drawbacks.
This
 essay will first demonstrate that the high level of education and
time
 management brings several benefits followed by an analysis of how the primary disadvantage , namely depression ,is not valid. The main reason to start with having different classrooms for
children
 is that
this
 increases the concentration .
That is
 to say that they can prepare their notes effectively which is beneficial for
students
.
Moreover
, for educational centres,
students
 with higher knowledge are very important because they show remarkable results
such
 as winning in some Olympiads .
For example
 ,in countries
such
 as Norway or Germany
children
 with an extra level of education achieve a high score on university exams and they are more successful and clever pupils. Learning in special
classes
also
 helps improve
children
's
time
 management .
In other words
, when they study lessons with
students
 with low grades, they spend more
time
 and they get bored.
For instance
 ,in mixed
classes
, advanced
children
 can not show their knowledge effectively because
children
 with low grades
could not
Wrong verb form
cannot
show examples
 teach them . Those opposed to
this
 essay that if individuals are separated into various groups it will be quite difficult for them to adapt to a new collective and it takes more
time
 to find new friends .
For example
 , these teenagers can get depressed which can lead to low marks. In conclusion , the fact that separate
classes
 bring more benefits and they can become more smarter and useful to the world .
Submitted by huseynova.nigul on

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task achievement
Try to elaborate more on your main points with additional examples or explanations to reinforce your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure the transition between points is smoother to enhance the overall flow of your essay.
task achievement
Be cautious of minor grammatical errors and punctuation to maintain clarity.
task achievement
Expand on potential disadvantages to provide a more balanced view and strengthen your analysis.
coherence cohesion
The essay provides a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, making it easy to follow.
task achievement
Relevant, real-world examples are included to support the argument, such as the mention of countries like Norway and Germany.
task achievement
You've effectively outlined the advantages and provided a counterpoint from the opposing view, which enhances the depth of your discussion.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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