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Band 6

‏In many countries, schoolchildren are required to wear school uniforms. ‏Do you think this should this be enforced in all schools?

#‏in #countries #schoolchildren #school #uniforms #‏do #be #schools
It is considered that environmental problems are relevant and should be taken more seriously since they have a huge impact on our
lives
.
However
, most
people
 do not take these issues seriously enough. Here are my thoughts on why the majority of
people
 do not care about the environment.
Firstly
, the main reason why
people
 do not give much thought to environmental issues is probably because it does not affect their daily
lives
 yet. Environmental problems
such
 as the greenhouse effect, global warming or pollution are always occurring, but because they are not always evident and they do not have direct influences on
human’s
Change noun form
human
show examples
lives
,
people
 do not take
this issue
Fix the agreement mistake
these issues
show examples
 seriously.
For instance
, icebergs are melting which
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 sea levels rise and
this
 will create extreme weather conditions like storms, hurricanes and typhoons. But since it does not affect us, we do not give it much consideration.
Secondly
,
people
 might think that their contributions make no or no difference.
This
 is not true, because contributions no matter how big or small would still have an impact
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 improving the environment.
For example
, simple actions
such
 as throwing away your garbage, picking up trash, or recycling and reusing
sure
Rephrase
apply
show examples
will help get rid of pollution,
also
 helping to spread awareness for
people
 around you.
To conclude
, a lot of
people
 do not care enough about environmental matters for many reasons,
such
 as being too subjective because they do not affect their
lives
 yet and thinking their actions would not make a difference.
Submitted by alext620 on

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task response
Ensure that all the main points are clearly linked to the topic and fully developed.
coherence and cohesion
Continue to include clear introduction and conclusion paragraphs that summarize the main points of the essay.

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