IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

Many doctors recommend that older people exercise regularly, but most patients do not follow an exercise routine. Why do you think this happens? How can people be encouraged to exercise regularly?

#doctors #people #exercise #patients
Exercise
 plays an important role in every individual’s life, it comes with a package of benefits that includes keeping many diseases at bay.
Exercise
 is recommended by many doctors for elderly
people
 but the majority of patients fail to work out daily.
This
 essay will throw a light on the possible reasons for patients skipping
exercise
 and a few ideas which can motivate them towards physical fitness.
To begin
 with, one of the reasons older
people
 avoid exercising is because many have pain in several joints and nerves which makes them less enthusiastic about working out as it requires energy and hard work. When in pain they feel sick and in turn skip their
exercise
 routine.
In addition
 to that, the other reason is a lack of awareness about the benefits it can provide. Many elderly
people
 are not aware that popular diseases like diabetes can be controlled by regular physical activities. Today there are many health issues like disc bulging and cervical which can be healed faster with daily
exercise
. To encourage them to
exercise
 daily, there are ways to attract them towards it, one of which is by making
exercise
 fun to do. They should be involved in some light sports activities like badminton which can help to keep them moving. One other way could be making them
exercise
 in groups, they are more likely to
exercise
 when they have someone of the same age around them. It's similar to how a child wants to go to school when he/she has friends.
Also
, spreading awareness about various diseases that working out can alone heal would be a good motivation for
people
 to
exercise
. To summarize, older
people
 tend to skip their workout as they prefer rest over
exercise
 and some are just not aware of its advantages, but as per the suggestions mentioned above they can be drawn towards physical fitness in many ways.
In addition
 to that, doctors and health institutions should campaign for awareness and various group
exercise
 sessions.
Submitted by hansa.pandit11 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
    What to do next:
    Look at other essays: