IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that one world government is better than national governments. Do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Some individuals reckon that single
planet
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Correct your spelling
government
goverment
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government
 is better than country
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governments
goverments
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governments
.
This
Linking Words
 essay will examine the advantages and disadvantages of
this
Linking Words
 statement and provide a logical conclusion. The two main advantages of
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world
Correct article usage
a world
show examples
 united
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government
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 are the unification of
humanity
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 and
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 absence of any war conflicts.
Firstly
Linking Words
, the
manace
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menace
 of nuclear war and
death
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the death
show examples
 of whole
humanity
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 because of
this
Linking Words
 would disappear. If
one
Use synonyms
 united
government
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 appears, it will bring peace around the
world
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. Because
humanity
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 would be united,
hence
Linking Words
government
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 would decide any problems that may appear.
For
Linking Words
instance
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, in
sci-fi
Correct article usage
a sci-fi
show examples
 book by Stephen King, he described the situation where the earth had
one
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 stable
government
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 and it thrived without any economical and social problems.
Secondly
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,
unification
Correct article usage
the unification
show examples
 of
humanity
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 is an incredible benefit for a
planet
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. All social, economical,
environmental
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and environmental
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 problems that currently are
in
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on
show examples
 the earth can be decided, because
humanity
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 is
unificated
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unified
unification
.
For
Linking Words
instance
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, in 2007 because of
usage
Correct article usage
the usage
show examples
 of some special minerals,
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 hole in
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ozone
Ozon
ozon
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the ozon
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 layer appeared.
This
Linking Words
 could
caused
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cause
be caused
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the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 disaster,
however
Linking Words
by
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apply
show examples
worldwide summit
humanity
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 solved
this
Linking Words
 problem.
Linking Words
Similarly
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,Similarly
show examples
 anything can be solved. At the same time, the
world
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government
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 has disadvantages too,
such
Linking Words
 as
destruction
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the destruction
show examples
 of
unique
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a unique
the unique
show examples
culture
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cultures
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 in every country and
inequality
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 among people.
Presumably
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,Presumably
show examples
one
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Correct your spelling
government
goverment
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government
 will stick to
one
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 culture and
relegion
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religion
. That may cause the deterioration of
uniqueness
Correct article usage
the uniqueness
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 of every nationality
in
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on
show examples
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planet
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the planet
show examples
.
For
Linking Words
instance
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 , according to
Star
Correct article usage
the Star
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 Wars
series
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,series
show examples
 there
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 not any special cultures
in
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on
show examples
one
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planet
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, all the same people.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
inequality
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 will appear
defenetily
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definitely
.
For
Linking Words
instance
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, according to Steve
Devis
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,Devis
show examples
 if the
one
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planet
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government
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 showed up in the future, that would cause massive
inequality
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 and destruction. To conclude,
although
Linking Words
 the
world
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 united
government
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 has negative certain effects like
inequality
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 and deterioration of cultures, it has an extremely good
influences
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influence
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 on the life of human beings like
inification
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unification
minification
 of
humanity
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 and lack of war conflicts. To my way of thinking,
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
 outweigh
drawbacks
Correct article usage
the drawbacks
show examples
.

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