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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

At the present time, the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the numbers of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

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Nowadays population growth in some countries goes towards the young generation.
This
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 change comes across with benefits including, promotion of economic situation and some drawbacks
such
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 as losing the experience of older
people
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.
To begin
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 with, young
people
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 play crucial roles in every
society
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's promotion in various aspects including economic and
health
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 situations. In terms of economics, young generations have better performance in the workforce and their productivity has superiority rather the aged persons.
On the other hand
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, young adults are more creative when face with problems and find practical solutions for them
thus
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, many companies rather work with young
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applicants
aplicants
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applicants
. All these reasons maybe can help any
society
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 to economic growth. Considering
health
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 circumstances, the elderly can have numerous
health
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 issues that affect their activities. All these diseases have financial effects on governments including
health
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 insurance, producing or importing expensive drugs for specific diseases and high-cost hospital equipment.
In other words
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, old generations are not cost-effective citizens, neither for the
health
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 care system nor for economic conditions. Despite the above arguments, older
people
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 living in the country have their own significance. One supportive statement states that older
people
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 have more experience because of their past works. A
society
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 with a large younger population maybe loses older ones’ experiences. In my opinion, their knowledge of solutions might be outdated. As long as we are living in a technological era it is inevitable a significant part of our life is related to technology those old populations do not have enough experience in
this
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 field. On the other side, countries with high young adult populations could have challenges in job sectors. Providing enough positions for all citizens maybe come across with a lot of stress and competition. I truly believe that
this
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 competition could improve
people
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’s abilities and improve the condition of
society
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. In conclusion,
although
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 it is true that the elderly have a lot of experiences, their increment in the population comes with problems. In terms of the
health
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 system elderly statement could be costly and their life experiences in our modern life could be unpractical.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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