IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Vaccinating children against preventable diseases is not only unnecessary but also dangerous. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

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Vaccinating
children
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 has become increasingly unpopular among certain demographics of society.
This
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 set of people claims that vaccinations are hazardous to
children
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's health and as
such
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 are not needed.
This
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 essay will argue why vaccinating against spreadable diseases is entirely necessary despite some potential risks. Parents have always been wary of vaccinating their
children
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. They are justifiably worried about injecting
children
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 with unfamiliar substances that could possibly make them sick.
In addition
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, Parents naturally feel protective of their
children
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.
For example
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, there have been some recorded instances of
children
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, unfortunately, reacting adversely to their injections. These few instances have bolstered existing fears in parents that immunisations are not necessary and potentially more dangerous than the possibility of contracting the communicable disease itself. Despite the minor risks associated with vaccinating
children
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, the fact that they are unnecessary and dangerous is completely preposterous. Vaccines have prevented vast numbers of deaths over hundreds of years in countries around the world.
Furthermore
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, the number of deaths so far prevented far outweighs the number of
children
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 who have been adversely affected by the immunisations themselves. Some diseases have actually been completely eradicated through vaccination campaigns.
Hence
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, the idea that vaccinations are unnecessary and dangerous is ill-informed and dangerous in itself and could potentially lead to far worse outcomes for society. In conclusion,
this
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 essay argued that people who are against vaccination have a flawed understanding of immunisations and underestimate the effects of what they believe. In my opinion, vaccinating
children
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 is an absolute imperative
that is
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 entirely justified despite the small and occasional risks involved.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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