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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Young people committing crimes should be treated the same as adults by the authorities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #crimes #adults #authorities
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There are reformers today who argue that adults and young
people
 should be treated equally under the law. In my opinion, despite the ostensible fairness of
this
 proposal, it disregards crucial psychological differences. Those who believe all ages should receive equal treatment, point out that
this
 will engender a greater deterring effect. The main reason that all individuals in society are punished is not for justice alone, but as a means to ensure others will not commit similar crimes. Young
people
 learn in school and the world generally that their actions will have consequences and that crimes are punishable with prison time and other penalties. If these censures are weakened,
then
 the chances a young person will attempt to commit a crime will logically increase, even if the total number of young
people
 engaging in criminal
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
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 today is lower than at any point in human history.
However
, age is a just mitigating factor. Adults who commit crimes have had more time to develop socially and intellectually while young
people
 might not fully grasp the consequences of their choices for themselves and others.
For instance
, there have been recent cases where young
people
 were influenced by extremist elements now pervasive in social media. Young
people
 are more impressionable in these situations and often lack the confidence and maturity to think for themselves.
This
 vulnerability extends to their emotional and intellectual development and justifies laws that protect young
people
 from receiving overly harsh sentences. In conclusion, though there are practical reasons to support equal punishments for all ages,
this
 alteration would be unfair to young
people
. Courts should consider a range of factors before selecting an appropriate punishment.
Submitted by jakedth162 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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