As life expectancy is increasing, people work after retirement with pay. Alternatively, some people start to work at a young age. Are these positive or negative impacts?

#life #expectancy #people #work #retirement #age #impacts

Over the past few decades, the world has evolved and changed substantially in many ways, dad resulted in improved medical facilities and treatment which boosted

life

expectancy. Because of the higher

life

span,

people

tend to work even after

retirement

and a few start working at an early stage. From my point of view, it has numerous benefits. The merits are analysed in the ensuing paragraphs.

First

and foremost, an increased number of elder

people

, who are experienced and talented can serve the community to a greater extent. To explain

further

, when

people

work after

retirement

, the younger generation gets a chance to adapt to the new workforce much faster with the guidance of those experienced

people

Thus

, a sheer number of beginners can easily become Masters and could serve the community in a better manner.

Moreover

, in terms of young

people

who choose to start working from an early age can analyse and seek help from

people

with years of practice and skills.

Hence

, they can tackle complex situations in a feasible way.

Therefore

, the economy

get

Change the verb form

gets

show examples

served by not only the younger generation but

also

by seniors in the society

Secondly

, with regards to an individual, starting

career

Add an article

a career

show examples

early

Correct article usage

an early

show examples

stage or working even after

50s

Change the article

the 50s

show examples

help

Correct subject-verb agreement

helps

show examples

them to be independent and financially stable. To make it more clear,

early

Correct article usage

the early

show examples

stages of

life

and

life

after

retirement

is considered to be the most crucial point in

life

where

people

need assistance and help to survive.

For instance

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

a young student, might need financial assistance and guidance for being successful in

life

, while older

people

need money for medical care and their personal needs. In

such

scenarios, even though they are independent as a person, they might be under someone's shadow.

Therefore

, work help them stay away from pressure and the burden of bills in a plausible way. So they can live a happy

life

which does not force them to put up with an unhappy situation. To conclude, working at a very young age and even after

retirement

is not only a means of passive income but

also

Remove the article

apply

show examples

support that individuals

earns

Change the verb form

earn

show examples

for themselves which is equally beneficial for the family as well as the economy

Submitted by balnuramangeldy on Tue Aug 02 2022

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

370 words

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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As life expectancy is increasing, people work after retirement with pay. Alternatively, some people start to work at a young age. Are these positive or negative impacts?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people think that the best way to be successful in life is to get a university education. Others disagree and say this is no longer true.

In some societies the number of crimes committed by teenagers is growing. What are the reasons for this trend? And what possible solutions could reduce this issue?

Students should pay the full cost for their own study, because university education benefits individuals rather than society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Study shows that many criminals have low levels of education. For this reason, some people believe that the best way to reduce crime is to educate people in prison, so that they can get a job when they leave prison. Do you agree or disagree?

These days, it is becoming increasingly popular for people to live in another country for either work or their studies. While many people can find greater opportunities abroad, others may struggle to adapt. What are the advantages of living in a foreign country and what are the disadvantages?